The Places You Have Come To Fear The Most
by alexp
Summary: previously So Beautiful. Rory’s an RA at Yale. Tristan lives on her floor. Over time they become friends, or at least that's what Rory thinks?
1. I shall call him squishy

Rory lay down on the couch in the living room of the house in which she had grown up in. It was late in the afternoon but she was still in her pyjamas. She wasn't sick, it was just the kind of day were nothing in the world sounded better then relaxing with a pile of sugar packed junk food, and reading a good book. A book, that was for once, not on an assigned reading list.

Rory felt that she deserved such indulgence. It was the summer, the last month of summer to be exact, a summer in which she had vowed to do nothing. She felt she owed herself such a time. She had been at Yale for a long two years. Two years were study had come first. It had been an adjustment from high school, even a high school like Chilton, but she had managed by putting it first in her line of priorities. So now was the summer of Rory. She wasn't going to get a job, or go on a whirlwind trip of Europe or even berate herself for not managing to acquire a much sought after internship, as Paris had, she was going to relax in her home town, with her mom and watch the world go by. Until now at least;

"Rory, get of your ass and do something" her mother's voice interrupted her as she crashed into the room at a million miles an hour, laden down with shopping bags.

"Hi, to you too" Rory shot back sitting up.

Lorelai collapsed on the couch next to her.

"I'm sorry, but seriously, it's three o'clock in the afternoon and you've been sitting there, for two months"

"I thought you were on board with the whole summer of Rory, schools been hard and…" Rory stated exasperated, before being cut of.

"I know, and believe me I was on board. I've been telling you to take it easy for the last five years, but enough is enough. Live a little or at least move a little"

"Fine" Rory stated getting up grudgingly, "So Luke's?" She added feigning enthusiasm and heading to get ready.

"That's going to be a big trip for you honey, sure you can make it" Lorelai shouted after her, "Want me to pack a suitcase".

***

Rory and Lorelai entered the diner and grabbed a table by the window.

"So how was the mall?" Rory inquired.

Lorelai ignored her, and started digging around in her purse, which was as usual overflowing with useless junk.

"What are you looking for?" Rory continued unperturbed.

"Nemo" her mother shot back.

"Very funny" Rory replied half-heartedly.

"I shall call him squishy, and he shall be mine" Lorelai continued, looking up.

"Enough with the Finding Nemo references, it's all I've heard for the last month and a half. I should never have gotten you the DVD" Rory sighed.

"That's why I love you, and that's why I got you these!" Lorelai informed her triumphantly, holding up two tickets.

"What are those?"

"Tickets"

"I can see that, but what kind of tickets"

"Concert tickets"

"What is this, twenty questions?"

"Yes"

Rory stared at her, starting to lose patience.

"Well I was walking by the record store, thinking, how am I going to get Rory out of the funk she had been in"

"I have not been in a funk" Rory said indignantly.

"Regardless of your funkiness…hey is that a word and if it is a word it sounds dirty…anyone back on topic, I thought a concert, what a great way to get Rory out of the house and then I saw that Idlewild…"

"Oh"

"Were opening for Longwave…"

"Oh oh"

"Who were opening for, drum roll please…Ash"

"I love Ash"

"I know"

"And Lane loves Ash"

"I know that too, hence the two tickets"

"You didn't want to come"

"I thought I'd pass…because I got two tickets for…the Violent Femmes, on the same night, thankyou" Lorelai informed her pulling another two tickets out from her purse.

"Wow, that purse is just filled with amazing things today" Rory concluded.

"It is my magic purse" Lorelai replied, before pausing for a minute and then continuing, "I shall call it squishy…"

"Mom" Rory yelled, interrupting her and blocking her ears.

***

Lane and Rory walked down the street towards the music store.

"So remember to thank your Mom for me" 

"I will" Rory replied.

"It's kind of a shame that we couldn't see the Violent Femmes too" Lane mused.

"Believe me after a week of hearing, Blister in the Sun twenty four hours a day, you wouldn't want too"

"I'll take your word for it" Lane replied.

"Rory" a voice called out. As Lorelai came running over from across the street

"Come come come" She added, grabbing her by the arm.

"I guess I'll see you later" Rory waved at Lane as she was dragged off across the street.

After they had run half a block they stopped in front of a store window.

"Look" Lorelai stated.

"At what" Rory shot back in confusion.

"The Jacket" Lorelai replied awestuck.

Rory looked at a long jacket with fur trim, which was very bright, very long and very Lorelai.

"I need it" Lorelai informed her.

"You pulled me all the way here, and made me abandon Lane in the middle of the street for a Jacket?" Rory stated disbelievingly.

"Not any jacket, The Jacket" she stated dramatically.

"I have no words" Rory replied.

"I know that this might sound crazy but I have a feeling that Saturday night is going to be a big night for both of us and I need the prefect outfit".

"Why is this going to be a big night?"

"Well you have to admit we've both been in a bit of a rut lately"

"I don't know what you're talking about" Rory replied feigning ignorance.

"Come on, when was the last time you went on a date"

"That guy um...you know the one… with the hair" Rory replied exasperated searching for the guy's name.

"See you don't even remember his name it was that long ago" Lorelai stated triumphantly.

"Like you can talk" Rory shot back.

"Exactly, so this is just what we need"

"It's not like I don't want to meet someone" Rory replied softly, "I've just been busy".

"I know and believe me; the law of averages was destined to even out for you. This is payback for those high school years were there always seemed to be two guys going after you at once"

"There weren't always two…" Rory began defensively before stopping her self, "Well I guess there was, but that wasn't my fault".

"I know, I'm just saying it's time to get out there. Were not going to meet someone in the trip from our house to Luke's"

"Well there is always Lu…"

Lorelai interrupted her, "Not another word out of you or I'm not letting you borrow my coat".

"Kirk" Rory continued laughing as she followed her Mom into the store.

To be continued.


	2. A college full of Kirks

"I have exactly twenty seven days until classes start" Rory stated, glancing up from her spot at the kitchen table where she was studiously making up a schedule for the new school year.

"Wow, you really are a geek" Lorelai shot back from her position at the stove were she was making popcorn.

"I am not, I'm just being organised" Rory replied slightly perturbed, before changing the subject, "Anyway the bigger question is why are using the stove?"

"To make popcorn" Lorelai replied, as if it was a stupid question.

"Yes, but why aren't you just using the microwave kind, I thought we had this conversation about you staying away from dangerous utensils"

"I know but it tastes better this way…and Luke bet me five bucks I wouldn't use my stove in the next week, therefore I must prove him wrong" Lorelai stated simply.

"Oh, I knew there was a hidden agenda behind this sudden domesticity" Rory replied, turning back to her work.

"There's no hidden agenda, I just want my five bucks" Lorelai finished. "So have you worked out what classes you're taking"?

"I'm torn, should I go for Greek Tragedy or Sociology of Middle Town America" Rory mused aloud.

"Defiantly the Tragedy, you my dear need some drama in your life" Lorelai informed her daughter.

Rory nodded in reply and marked in her choice, "There, all finished", she stated.

"And with only a month to go" Lorelai shot back from her position at the stove where the popcorn caught on fire and she was desperately trying to put out the flames.

* * *

Rory sat on her bed, as Lane twirled around in front of her trying to decide on the perfect outfit.

"Its fine" Rory stated exasperated, "We have to get going if we're going to make it in time" she added.

"I don't want it to be fine, it has to be perfect" Lane replied, heading back over to Rory's closet.

"Have you been talking to my Mom?"

"Yes, and she's right. I can feel it, tonight is the dawning of a new era"

"Tonight is a concert, not a life changing event" Rory informed her getting up to get her purse.

"Don't kill my buzz, Rory, my life is boring I don't go to a big fancy college were exiting things happen"

"Lane, your life's not boring, it's just different. And believe me nothing happens at my school. I study, I sleep, that's about it, oh and I argue with Paris, can't leave that of my list"

"But what about the guys, exiting mysterious smart guys from all over the country. Not tweedy, quite Adventist boys from the next county over"

"You'd think so wouldn't you, but they're pretty much like the guys at Chilton, weird, and even worse they drink. Believe me a drunk college guy is not a pretty sight. Particularly when they try to sound intelligent, they all come out sounding like Kirk"

"A college full of Kirks, now that is not a pretty image" Lane replied.

"They're not that bad" Rory acknowledged, "I just haven't really felt like doing the whole dating thing"

At that moment Lorelai stormed into the room, "Ok we're running late, so here you go" She stated handing Rory the keys to the jeep, "We're taking Sookie's car, have fun, try not to get arrested and that's it, bye" she finished leaving the way she had entered.

* * *

Rory and Lane made their way from the car to the entrance of the venue. It was packed apparently half of Hartford had turned up.

"This is so cool" Lane squealed, as they pushed through the glass doors, into the foyer.

Rory nodded in reply, looking around for the entrance to their section. As they made their way over to it, Rory tried to muster up some enthusiasm to match Lanes.

It wasn't that she didn't love the bands playing it was just a general feeling of nothingness. She stopped herself from fondly thinking about the half finished copy of Persuasion that sat on her bedside table.

"Look there's the guitar tech, the guitar tech!" Lane screamed excitedly, as a forty year old man with a pot belly, arrived on stage to tune instruments.

"You need to calm down" Rory informed her friend as they settled into their seats.

The concert started soon after and Rory began to enjoy herself. After the first band had finished their set, Rory excused herself to go to the bathroom. Lane nodded in reply as she was heavily engrossed in a conversation with the guy who was sitting next to them wearing a Hives t-shirt and had booed his way through the first bands set.

Rory searched for a bathroom were the line was less then a mile long. She made her way up, flight of stairs, after stairs until she had to sit down for a minute to catch her breath. She began to get up when she heard footsteps, but stopped when she heard her name called out;

"Rory Gilmore" someone stated with more then a hint of surprise in their voice.

Rory turned around to see who had called her name and took a minute to process the face.

"Tristan?" she asked apprehensively, staring up at a face she hadn't seen in more then three years.

"The one and only" Tristan replied cockily.

"I see you haven't changed" Rory shot back, standing up to face him.

"How are you?" he asked acting genuinely pleased to see her.

"Good, and yourself" she replied getting over the shock of seeing him.

"I'm fine, just got back into to town. I've been at Duke for the last two years" he informed her as if they were old friends, rather then old whatever they had been, "My parents thought it was best I stay in North Carolina until I sorted things out, but now I'm back in Connecticut and starting Yale in the fall" he continued.

"Needed a change of scenery" Rory replied slightly taken back with his candour.

"Actually my fathers not really that great, health wise, so the family thought it was better I be nearby" Tristan stated softly.

"I'm sorry" Rory said lost for words.

"He's going to be okay, it just…made people rethink their priorities" Tristan informed her before lightening the mood, "So are you home from Boston for the break?"

"Boston?" Rory replied, slightly confused.

"Yeah, Harvard right. Isn't that were you wanted to go"

"How did you…no…well I did want to go there but things changed. I'm actually at Yale"

"Really" Tristan replied, slightly taken back with the news.

"Uh huh, two whole years, Paris is there too, I've been rooming with her since we were freshman"

"You and Paris, roommates? Now that is something I have to see" Tristan stated trying not to laugh.

"I thought you two hated each other" he added.

"Things change" Rory replied back, "Anyway we're not rooming together this year, I'm actually going to be a RA, so I get a single".

"Why am I not surprised" Tristan smirked.

"What's that supposed to mean" Rory shot back defensively.

"Just…you always were an overachiever"

"As opposed to a slacker who couldn't even stay in school"

"Ouch" Tristan feigned hurt, "Maybe you have changed, and you've gotten mean"

"I'm a regular Susan Lucci" Rory informed him.

"So, enjoying the concert" he asked searching for something to say.

"Yeah, and you"

"Sure, I'm actually really want to see Longwave and they're starting up in a few minutes so I better get back to my seat" Tristan informed her looking, at his watch and heading to leave.

"Of course go" Rory replied, slightly taken back.

"It was good to see you" Tristan called back to her as he made hiis way up the stairs.

"You too" Rory stated softly, still reeling from their encounter. Tristan Dugray was absolutely the last person she had expected to see tonight. She thought to herself as she made her way back to her seat.

And he was going to Yale, now that was an interesting turn of events.

To be continued…


	3. He’s your felicity

Rory stumbled her way into the kitchen, still dressed in her pyjamas and robe. She mumbled hello to her Mom and poured herself a cup of coffee before slumping into a chair.

"Cheery this morning" Lorelai stated enthusiastically from her spot at the table were she was reading the paper.

"Big night need more sleep" Rory replied haltingly, laying her head on the table.

"Can't sleep the day away" Lorelai shot back.

"Why are you so chirpy, when I got home you weren't even back yet" Rory asked suspiciously.

"Well, the truth is…I haven't gone to sleep yet" Lorelai replied grinning goofily.

"You are so going to crash" Rory said, grinning.

"We were just having such a great time" Lorelai informed her, getting up for a refill, "The concert was awesome, and then we went to this Karaoke bar that was filled with crazy tourists who couldn't speak English" she continued, " Believe me you have not lived until you've seen a three hundred pound German guy singing 'Mandy'".

"I'll take your word for it" Rory answered.

"So how was your night" Lorelai asked changing the subject.

"Great, all of the bands rocked. You should have seen Lane she looked like she had died and gone to groupie heaven" Rory replied, "Oh, and you will never guess sho I ran into".

"Tara Reid"

Rory just looked at her in reply.

"Well that girl seems to be everywhere"

"Tristan DuGrey" Rory finished dramatically.

"I was close" Lorelai replied.

"How was that close" Rory asked incredulously.

"Their both…blond" Lorelai shot back searching for a reason. "So Tristan, you haven't seen him since…"

"Junior year" Rory finished for her, "And the really weird part is. He's going to Yale now".

"Wow, he followed you across the country to college, he's your felicity" Lorelai stated with a straight face.

"He's not my felicity. He didn't know I was at Yale he thought I was at Harvard, besides his Dad's sick so he transferred to be closer to home, that's it" Rory explained hurriedly.

"I was just kidding" Lorelai replied, "So how was he?"

"I don't know the same. I didn't really talk to him for that long" 

"So, you, Paris and Tristan, back in the same school, that should be interesting" Lorelai speculated.

"I doubt I'll even see him, it's a big school" Rory replied, putting an end to the conversation.

***

Rory started to organise the things in her closet. She still had a few weeks to go but she was already thinking about the things she would have to take to school.

It was going to be weird to have a single. For the last two years she had shared a suite with the same people but now she would really be on her own, and Rory couldn't say she wasn't looking forward to it. It would be nice to have her own space, without Paris hovering around. Paris was moving into an apartment off campus as were many of their former dorm mates.

She sat down and attempted to make a list of all the things she would need to bring, but got sidetracked by her thoughts. She couldn't say that she hadn't loved college so far. After the initial adjustment, she had begun to enjoy classes, made new friends and still managed to spend enough time at home. But she still felt like nothing life changing had happened. And she almost felt like this year was her last chance. Senior year would bring on a whole new batch of worries and changes, in regards to her future life and career, so this year felt like her last real chance to experience college life.

Although she didn't like to admit it, she worried that this feeling was related to the fact that she hadn't been in a serious relationship since Jess had left. There had been dates here and there, the casual flirtatious friendship but nothing more. As she had told Lorelai she had been busy, but it was more then that, she felt deep down that something was stopping her, going the next step. There was a fear of what would happen, of not only being hurt, but of just trusting someone like that and opening up.

Rory tried to shake her head out of this train of thought and focused on practical things, things she could plan. She then began a new list of things to do in her remaining days of vacation. She decided to focus on the here and now, and not whatever lay in store for her in the future, that was up to fate.

***

Rory dragged her bag up the second flight of stairs. She had finally arrived back. It was a weird feeling to be back at school, almost like being home. She searched for her new room. The dorm in which she was going to be an R.A in was different to the one she had stayed in for her first two years of college. It consisted of doubles, that were larger then her last room, without the lounge she had benefited from but with private bathrooms. It was also co-ed on each floor. 

She found her room at the end of the hallway and let herself in, immediately opening the windows to air it out. It was a typical dorm room and upon inspection she found that the bathroom was small but nice. Rory however felt the joy of it immediately. After two years of trudging down a long hallway, after waking up in the middle of the night with a sudden urge to go the toilet, a personal bathroom was heaven.

After unpacking, Rory went out to the halls to see what was happening. It was virtually deserted. The R.A's had been told to come to school a few days early in order to get there briefings before welcoming the new freshman.

"Rory" a voice called out.

Rory turned around to see who it was and spotted a familiar figure.

"Ryan" she shouted, enveloping her friend in a hug.

She had met Ryan the previous year in one of her politics classes. He was about her height with a solid build, sandy brown hair and greyish eyes. He looked intimidating until you got to know him and then he was possibly one of the kindest people you could meet. They had been assigned to work on a presentation together and had been friends ever since.

"What are you doing here" Rory asked, surprised to see him.

"I'm the other RA on this floor" he informed her sheepishly.

"You" Rory replied surprised.

"Hey, I can help people" he replied defensively before smirking, "Actually someone backed out at the last minute and one of the co-ordinators conned me into it, and then I found out I'd be working with you and I couldn't resist".

"How's Michelle" Rory asked. Michelle had been Ryan's high school girlfriend whom he had maintained a long distance relationship with.

"Actually we broke up over the summer" He informed her quietly, "We went away to South America together, and let's just say it didn't go that well"

"I'm sorry" Rory replied sympathetically.

"Yeah well, we had both just changed too much, it just wasn't there anymore" he continued.

"It's tough when that happens" Rory stated.

"So on to happier topics, how was your summer, any new loves of your life" Ryan asked cheering up.

"No, you know me. Lots of reading, sleeping, hanging with my Mom… oh I did see Ash, that was cool, but aside from that not much else" Rory informed him, "So back to you how was South America, besides the whole break up?"

"We'll go get coffee and I'll tell you all about it. It was great; we have to have Brazilian theme night…." Ryan trailed off as they walked down the hall.

***

Rory woke up to the sound of moving. Boxes were banging against doorframes, doors kept opening and closing. It seemed half of Yale was moving in today.

They had welcomed the freshman in yesterday, and today the returning students were moving in. Rory had enjoyed showing the new kids around, remembering her first day which seemed like only yesterday in hindsight. Together she and Ryan had managed to answer most of there questions. She couldn't believe how much she had lucked out, not only had she gotten some one great to work with, he was also a friend.

Rory got up, showered and put on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. She was about to emerge out into the hallway when she heard a knock at the door.

Upon opening it, she saw a very stressed out looking Ryan. A strange sight, considering she had never even seen him look anything but totally in control.

"I need your help" he stated, grabbing her by the arm and dragging her down the hall.

"Morning to you too" she replied grinned.

Ryan pulled Rory through the hall until they arrived at the second last room on the right. Where a very perturbed looking girl was standing with her arms across her chest. 

"Look, I knew this was a co-ed floor but I didn't expect this" The girl huffed.

"Rory this is Jessica", Ryan explained slowly for the girls benefit, "And she's not happy with her roommate".

Rory grabbed the list Ryan was holding and skimmed it looking for the girl's name.

"Ok, it says Jessica and Trista, room 327, both juniors, both transfer students" Rory read from the list, "I'm failing to see the problem" Rory asked confused.

"That is the problem" Jessica stated dramatically as she pointed at something behind them. 

Rory and Ryan turned around to see a smirking male holding a box, standing in the hallway.

"Tristan?" Rory stated, slightly taken back.

"Trista" Ryan added, doubling over in laughter.

"See" Jessica stated storming out of the room angrily.

"I see we've all met" Tristan said entering the room and putting the box on the floor.

"Mary, nice to see you again" he added sitting on the bed.

'Mary" Ryan mouthed at her.

Rory ignored him for a moment.

"You're living in this dorm?" Rory asked.

"It seems that way, although but my roommate doesn't look that happy with the idea" Tristan stated smiling.

"I think there's been a mistake" Rory informed him.

"I assumed so" he replied, "Although a female roommate doesn't sound all that unappealing, if you know what I mean" he added.

Ryan laughed, before introducing himself, "I'm Ryan, one of the RA's, and this is Rory although it seems you two already know each other".

"Oh we go way back" Tristan informed him.

"Um…" Rory interrupted them, looking up from the room list she was reading, "There seems to be a spare spot for Jessica in a room down the hall, so if you don't mind staying here, the problem should be solved".

"I'll go tell Jessica" Ryan announced leaving the room.

"So" Rory stated putting her hands in her pockets.

"So" Tristan replied back, "You're my RA".

"Looks that way to me" Rory said casually.

"So that means we'll be living together this year" Tristan insinuated.

"Well yes…but not like…" Rory stammered, trailing off.

"Am I making you nervous, Mary?"

"No" Rory shot back defensively.

"You know it's a pretty big coincidence, us living on the same floor" Tristan stated changing the subject.

'Oh well, these things happen" Rory said lightly.

'I mean what are the odds" Tristan pondered.

"Look, I have to go" Rory replied, suddenly feeling the urge to get out of there. "You know people to help and all…um if you have any problems or questions, just come see me…or Ryan, our doors are always open" Rory stammered, quickly walking out of the room.

"I might just do that" Tristan shouted after her.

To be continued…


	4. Alphabetically or chronologically

Rory heard a knock at the door.

"It's open" she called absentmindedly. She was sitting on her bed organising her things for class. Labelling notebooks, organizing notes and such, things most people would worry about five minutes before classes started, but Rory was not most people.

Ryan entered the room and sat down on the end of the bed, attempting not to disturb her piles.

"You do know actual classes don't start until next week" he stated, amused at her enthusiasm.

"I like to be prepared" Rory shot back.

"Fine, but you are coming out on Thursday, right?" he continued.

"Yes, for the fiftieth time. I know. It's the first big party of the year. I just have to go" Rory replied sarcastically.

"You do" Ryan informed her seriously, "It is our solemn duty as R.A's to make sure everyone on our floor has a good time".

"Oh, I must have missed that in the booklet" Rory sighed, getting up to grab a soda.

"Speaking of people on our floor, what's the deal with Trista?" Ryan asked slyly.

"There's no deal with Tristan, we went to high school together" replied back innocently.

"Sure", Ryan answered back sceptically.

"No really, nothing happened" Rory stated defensively, "Ok there was a tiny, tiny little thing sophomore year, it was nothing really, we had just both broken up with people and…" Rory continued before Ryan interrupted her smiling;

"So you two hooked-up" 

"No we did not hook-up! It was just a mistake, and it is way, way, way in the past" Rory replied attempting to end the conversation.

"And the Mary thing?" Ryan asked ignoring Rory's discomfort at the topic.

"That's what he used to call me, you know as in Virgin Mary" Rory said somewhat embarrassed.

"Interesting" Ryan replied.

"No not interesting, just annoying", Rory stated "Can we please talk about something else".

"Fine, I didn't know it was such touchy subject".

"It's not touchy it's just…" Rory began before changing tact, "So how's Michelle?" she asked smirking.

"I get the point" Ryan said, knowing he had been beaten.

***

"You ready" Ryan asked exasperated, from the other side of the door.

"Almost" Rory called out. 

She scrambled to grab a purse as Ryan began pounding on the door.

"You're such a girl" he called back.

"It'll just be another minute" She answered, taking one final look in the mirror. She flattened down her denim skirt and making sure the turquoise top she was wearing wasn't too revealing, not that any of her clothes would make Emily Gilmore blush, it was just a slightly different look then she was used too. 

She didn't know what she was so worried about. It was just a party, but Ryan had been making such a big deal about this being the first big party of the semester, and whatever happened tonight would reflect on the rest of the year.

She finally made it out into the hallway and was greeted by a low whistle.

"Looking good, Gilmore" Ryan stated.

"Why thankyou" Rory replied, "You're not so bad yourself", she added taking in Ryan's, worn in to perfection jeans, grey top and ever present black cuff. She had sworn that there would need to be an operation to remove that thing

"I try" Ryan responded, smirking.

They made their way down the crowded hall, acknowledging people as they passed. Rory couldn't help but smile at how exited some of the freshman were.

"Rory" one of them, who Rory vaguely remembered being called Trisha called, "I'll see you there" she informed her excitedly.

"Sure" Rory responded, smiling, "I'll be fun" she added.

"It sure will" a voice on her right said.

Tristan was leaning against the doorframe.

'So, mind if I tag along with you guys" he asked, greeting them.

"Sure" Ryan replied, "Nice to see you again Trista".

"I'm never going to live that down, am I" Tristan smirked.

"Nope" Ryan shot back.

"Are we going or what" Rory stated impatiently.

"Not happy to see me, Mary" Tristan asked.

"I'm fine, I just want to get going" she added.

They all stepped in line and made there way out of the building.

"It feels kind of tense in here" Ryan stated, breaking the silence.

"I was feeling the same thing, I think Rory here as a problem with me" Tristan said, somewhat condescendingly.

"No, I don't. I was just wondering why you couldn't find your own friends to go with instead of harassing us" Rory replied harshly.

"I didn't know I was intruding" Tristan responded, feigning sincerity, "Was this a date?"

"No" Ryan and Rory replied at the same time.

"Ok then" he continued, "Well there were like twenty freshman girls, begging me to come with them, but you know, they're just a little young for me. Plus with all of them hanging around how was I going to find a real woman" he leered

"My heart goes out to you" Rory shot back sardonically.

"Ok will you two call a truce" Ryan pleaded, "I for one, plan to have a good time, and I don't want your little bickering match ruining my evening"

Rory and Tristan nodded in agreement.

"So Tristan, how are you finding Yale so far?" Ryan asked, as the walked across the central quad.

"Pretty good. No complaints, but I'll wait and see until classes start" Tristan replied.

"What are you majoring in" Rory asked, following Ryan's instructions and attempting to be civil. It wasn't that she had anything against Tristan personally anymore. It was just something about him that sometimes rubbed her the wrong way.

"Well Rory since you asked, Business, accounting to be exact" Tristan replied.

"Hah" Rory responded, smirking.

"And what was that for" Tristan asked.

"It's just typical" Rory replied without elaborating.

"Like you're such a mystery" Tristan replied defensively "Let me guess, Journalism to start with"

Rory said nothing.

"But that's not it, definitely a double major…Political science?" he added.

"And Tristan scores" Ryan interrupted laughing, "What are you psychic"

"More like psychotic" Rory added, laughing in spite of herself, "Fine I'm predictable too", she finished as they arrived at there destination.

The dorm that was throwing the party was all lit up. They had placed tiki torches around the front path and half of the party had seemed to spill outside.

The threesome slowly made there way towards the entrance. Once inside Tristan managed to snag a couch in one of the lounges and they settled in.

"Drinks" Ryan asked, getting up.

Tristan and Rory, nodded and Ryan made his way off in search of refreshments.

The two sat in silence awkwardly.

"So" they both said at the same time.

"You go first" Tristan volunteered,

"Ryan's right" Rory started, "It's a new year, we're both different people, why don't we try to put the past behind us and start fresh"

"I couldn't agree more" Tristan responded smiling, "Hi, I'm Tristan and you are?" he stated holding out his hand.

"Rory Gilmore" she answered politely.

"And where are you from, Miss Gilmore" Tristan asked casually.

"A little town called Stars Hollow, you probably haven't heard of it"

"Actually I'm from Hartford, which is kind of near there" he replied, feigning surprise.

"What a coincidence…" Rory began before being interrupted by Ryan returning with their drinks.

He handed Tristan a beer and Rory some kind of tropical drink with umbrellas poking out of it.

"I'm not sure what's in it, but it sure looks pretty doesn't it" he informed her.

Rory took a sip, "Pretty lethal" she shot back.

"Rory" a voice called from across the room. Rory recognised her friend Beth.

"I'll be back soon" she informed the boys making her way across the room.

***

Rory managed to catch up with many people she hadn't seen for months. It was good to find out what everyone had spent there summers doing.

"Paris" Rory exclaimed, catching sight of the familiar blond.

"Hey" Paris greeted her, less then enthused.

"I thought you weren't coming?" Rory asked confused. As of yesterday Paris had pointedly decided to give this party a miss. A decision related to certain incidents that had occurred at the same party the previous year. Events Paris was still living down.

"Well I changed my mind" she replied, "But this year, no drinking. I will be fully aware of all my actions and able to remember those of others, for future use of course" she continued.

"Okay" Rory replied unsure of how to respond.

"I'd be careful with that drink, Gilmore" she added suspiciously.

"I'm fine, so you have fun" Rory stated, keen to get away. As much as she had grown to appreciate Paris as a friend, there were times when she was just not a person you wanted to be around. And tonight seemed like one of those times.

Rory made her way for a refill and took in her surroundings. Maybe it was the tropical drink talking, or she felt like she was having a pretty great time. She glanced around the room and caught sight of Ryan talking to some of his former suite mates. He too looked like he was having fun. She was glad, although he hid it well she was sure that the break up had really hurt him. Michelle had been his first serious girl friend, from what she could tell, he had been a bit of a player before she came along. Ryan saw her staring at him and gave a little smile before turning back to the conversation. It was strange to think of him as single. He had always been off limits, but Rory was pretty sure they were too good of friends for anything to happen. He already knew her to well, there was no mystery and it would defiantly ruin the friendship.

Rory made her way outside and immediately spotted Tristan sitting on the stairs, beer in hand.

She went over and settled down next to him.

"Having fun?" she asked casually.

"Mostly" he responded, taking a sip of his drink, "But I did run into one of my ex's, and let's just say, awkward is not the word", he added sheepishly.

"Well, there's so many of them, how can they be avoided" Rory replied flippantly

"Hey, there's not that many" Tristan shot back defensively, but with a smile on his face.

"No that many? Even Madeline had a hard time keeping track of all of the girls in our class who you had gone out with, and she was an expert" Rory replied light-heartedly.

"Ok… there were a few"

"A few" Rory answered, disbelievingly.

"What do you want a list?" Tristan asked, sighing.

"Yes" Rory joked.

"That might take a few days. Do you want alphabetically or chronologically" Tristan replied, pretending to think.

Rory playfully hit him on the shoulder.

"But seriously, that was back then, believe me Military School, seriously cramped my style" he informed.

"I bet you made up for it in college" Rory shot back.

"Why did you think I had too transfer" he teased.

They sat there staring out at the party surrounding them.

"And what about you" Tristan continued.

"Me, nothing to tell really" Rory replied seriously.

"Sure, I remember a certain guy who was willing to punch my lights out to protect your honour" Tristan stated.

"Dean?" Rory replied, remembering the infamous dance.

"Bagboy himself" Tristan smirked.

"That was over a long time ago" Rory pondered thoughtfully, "And then there was Jess"

"And now" Tristan asked casually.

"Now" Rory repeated, "Now it's just me".

"What about that Ryan guy" Tristan prompted.

"Were just friends" Rory informed him "Maybe you haven't heard of that concept, you know a guy and girl just being friends".

"I vaguely recall the idea" Tristan replied.

.

"Hey there's Paris" Rory stated, as she saw their old foe wondering around the path, possibly looking for someone to blackmail.

"Hide me" Tristan said, pretending to be scared.

Paris spotted them and walked over.

"Rory, just the person I was looking for" Paris stated, "Tristan, nice to see you again" she added taking in her former crush with an air of disinterest.

Tristan waved a greeting.

"What's up?" Rory asked apprehensively.

"One of your freshman, is throwing up all over Jason Cole's bed, and lets me just say, he does not look happy" she informed her.

"Oh boy" Rory replied getting up.

She waved a goodbye to Tristan and followed Paris inside.

Tristan waved back before heading of in the other direction.

To be continued…


	5. Touché, Mary

"Ok, that's about it" Ryan stated, as he brought the floor meeting to a close. "Good luck, for the first week of classes, and don't forget about the movie night tonight" he finished.

"That's right" Rory added, "After much debate, the selections for the first annual third floor Sunday night double feature are…drum roll please…" Rory said dramatically, "well you'll just have to turn up to find out" she teased. 

The gathered group laughed. It was floor tradition that the movies were kept a secret until they began. That way no one had time to complain. By the time the movie started everyone was so comfortable with their blankets and popcorn that no one could be bothered moving.

Rory herself had fallen under this trap, when a friend who had lived on this floor had invited her to one such event and she had ended up having to sit through Summer Catch. She had sworn she was scarred for life.

"So, do you think that went ok?" Ryan asked her, as the meeting dispersed.

Rory nodded in silent agreement.

"Do you think the Ben Stiller movie double is going to be fine" Ryan continued, suddenly worried, "Zoolander followed by Reality Bites?"

"Winona Ryder before she became a punch line" Rory shot back, "Who could resist" she added smiling.

"You're right, although I was personally campaigning for, There's something about Mary" Ryan shot back.

"Totally overrated" Rory answered exasperated, "Besides that's only because you have a thing for Cameron Diaz".

"I just find her to be a very talented actress" Ryan replied defensively as they stopped outside Rory's door.

Rory just sighed in return but with a smile on her face.

She waved Ryan goodbye and entered her room, closing the door behind her. Glad to finally have some peace and quite. It had been a busy couple of days. 

Rory checked her messages, and smiled as she listened to the sole message that graced her machine.

"Hi, it's me, the one who birthed you" it began, "So I haven't heard from you in a couple of days… and I just assumed you had gone on a four day bender after your party on Thursday. But then I realised, that I was getting you confused with my other daughter… Barbara Bush. Who by the way also goes to Yale, did you realise that? Well of course you did because CNN is like your second favourite channel, but if I had remembered that one of the Bush girls had gone there, that would have defiantly made the con list, thus maybe changing your entire future. So maybe I should be calling Harvard... anyway… call me." Lorelai's voice finished.

Rory picked the phone and dialled home. Lorelai picked up on the first ring.

"You're insane" Rory began.

"Why thankyou" Lorelai answered.

"I'm sorry I haven't called, it's just the whole RA thing has been so crazy" Rory continued.

"That's ok, I don't mind being ignored" 

"Yes, that is your reputation" Rory replied.

"So how are things, was the party good. Did Paris dance on the table again?" Lorelai inquired eagerly.

"No, no drunken spectacles, at least from Paris. It was okay, I just hung out with Ryan" Rory said before continuing after a pause, "and Tristan".

"Oh really" Lorelai replied suspiciously.

"Don't use that tone" Rory answered.

"What tone" Lorelai continued in an equally suspicious manner.

"The, you think something's going on tone"

"Ok I'll stop"

"Thankyou" Rory stated, "Were friends, or at least acquaintances, it would be a bit hard to avoid him since he's living on my floor".

"Very practical" Lorelai replied, trying to erase any tone out of her voice.

"Moving on, how is Ryan, is he getting on okay after the break-up" Lorelai continued.

"Yeah, he seems to be, although he could just be in a state of denial" Rory concluded.

"That's what guys do, or they just move on way to quickly and end up getting hurt even more", Lorelai replied thoughtfully, "Watch out for him".

"I will" Rory replied, "So I've got to head to the bookstore. I'll call you later in the week and I'm defiantly coming home next weekend".

"Okay, good luck with classes, and remember sit next to any cute boys. You may end up being forced to work with them for the rest of the semester!" Lorelai advised her.

"Bye" Rory finished hanging up.

***

"Settle down people" Ryan yelled, from his prime position on the couch directly in front of the TV. The movie started up and there were cheers as the opening of Zoolander flashed on the screen.

Rory snuggled down in her position on Ryan's left, where she was huddled in a blanket and propped herself against the side of the couch.

She glanced around the darkened room as everyone settled down on blankets and bean bags. It had been a pretty good turnout; most of the floor was there. She stopped her mental count when she felt a nudge on her shoulder.

She glanced up to see Tristan dressed in sweats and holding a big bowl of popcorn.

"Move over" he whispered.

Rory grudgingly obeyed, shoving Ryan over and making room.

Tristan squeezed in beside her.

"Sorry I'm late" he whispered grinning.

"You're sitting on my arm" Rory replied, grimacing.

Tristan moved, but then whispered in her ear, "You know, if you're squashed, you can always sit on my lap".

Rory laughed in spite of herself. It was just such a Tristan thing to say, she couldn't help it.

"Maybe later" she shot back, turning her attention to the movie.

***

Rory suddenly became aware that she, Ryan and Tristan were they only ones left.

"Were did everyone go" Rory asked, puzzled.

"It's almost twelve" Ryan replied, "You know hardly anyone ever makes it through the whole two movies, besides we ran out of popcorn".

"Oh, But why didn't I see everyone leave" she continued confused.

"Because you fell asleep" Tristan added laughing.

"I did not", Rory shot back.

"Did too" Tristan replied, smirking.

Rory looked at Ryan for support, but he nodded in return.

Rory glanced up at the television and realised the movie was finishing and she had slept through the last hour and a half.

"I hope I didn't snore" Rory asked sheepishly.

"Don't worry, I would have hit you if you had" Ryan laughed, getting up to stop the video. "Ok guys, I'm off to bed" He informed them stretching, "I would have gone earlier, but I had Rory sprawled out all over my legs".

Rory and Tristan waved goodnight.

"So, here we are again" Rory began.

"Yep, just you and me", Tristan replied.

"It always seems to end up that way, doesn't it" Rory thought out loud.

"You just can't stay away from me" Tristan smirked.

"Hey, you were the one who sat next to me" Rory replied defensively.

"You were the one who used my shoulder as a pillow" Tristan, shot back.

"Well, it was comfy" Rory said, yawning.

"Why thankyou, it's good to know my shoulders are good for something".

"We better get to bed" Rory stated attempting to get up.

"Together?" Tristan replied, smirking.

"Sure, why not, let's go" Rory answered sarcastically.

"A guy can dream" Tristan said wistfully, "Beside's we've already slept together once" he added.

"No, I've slept on you once, you weren't actually asleep" Rory replied playing along.

"Touché, Mary" he replied

"Ah the Mary thing, typical. You always pull it out to try and annoy me when you've run out of comebacks, I'm on to your game Du Grey" Rory replied, finally managing to free herself from her blankets and stand up.

"My game?" Tristan replied, stretching out on the couch, "It's no game, I'm just totally in love with you" feigning seriousness.

"Huh, sure" Rory replied laughing, "We're totally made for each other", she added sarcastically.

"So I'll see you around" Tristan informed her getting up and pushing past her to the door, "I better get to bed, don't want to sleep in on my first day at a new school" he said mockingly.

"Night" Rory waved as she straightened up the common room.

Tristan waved over his shoulder as he walked down the hall.

To be continued…


	6. I don’t vibe

Rory collapsed on her bed. It was four o'clock on Thursday afternoon and she had just finished her last class of the week. It so happened that her schedule allowed her, like many others, the benefit of a Friday off. 

Rory was just glad that the week was over. As much as she enjoyed class, the first week was always crazy. What with organising classes, standing in the endless queues at the bookstore and meeting countless new acquaintances, as well as her RA duties, Rory was wiped.

As she was contemplating whether to actually get into her bed to nap, Ryan came crashing into the room.

"Don't you knock" she mumbled yawning, perturbed at the interruption.

"No" he shot back, lying down on the end of her bed.

Rory propped her self up at the elbows and glared at him.

"How were classes?" he asked ignoring her pointed stare.

"Fine" Rory mumbled.

"That's good" he replied, "So I'll pick you up at six?" he continued nonchalantly.

"What are you talking about?" Rory asked sitting up confused.

"Rory it's the first Thursday night of semester" Ryan shot back.

"No, last Thursday night was the first Thursday night of semester, this in the second" Rory answered as if he were a small child.

"Whatever, all I know is that last week was simply a warm up for tonight? The word is the bash that's happening over in west campus has already started. Apparently the econ students have been there since noon" Ryan replied excitedly.

"Well that bodes well for the future of our nations economy" she theorised.

"Hey, you had fun last week" Ryan informed her, ignoring her previous statement.

"Maybe, but I'm tired" Rory whined.

"You're coming, I don't care what you say" Ryan insisted, crossing his arms adamantly.

"Fine, but just let me have a nap and I'll meet you there later, Ok" Rory said, with a note of finality in her voice.

"Fine" Ryan answered back pouting as he got up and headed for the door.

Rory waved him goodbye and rolled over determined to sleep. 

Just as she was drifting off, there was a knock at the door.

"Ryan, go away" she shouted.

"Um, It's Tristan" a voice stated.

"Sorry" Rory replied, "Come in if you must" she added.

Tristan poked his head through the door.

"Hey" He stated apprehensively, "Were you sleeping?" he added softly.

"Trying too" Rory replied.

"Oh well, I was just asking if you were going to that thing tonight, because some of us are heading over now" he continued.

"Yeah, Ryan's already given me the hard sell, I'll be there later" Rory replied yawning.

"Cool, It wouldn't be a party without you" he smirked.

"Sure, I'm a regular Paris Hilton" Rory replied smiling.

"Ok, we'll have to catch up later then" Tristan stated.

"I'll just look for the crowd of drunk, swooning freshman"

"Hey, they don't have to be freshman" Tristan shot back as he closed the door.

Rory sighed to herself as she lent over and set her alarm clock for seven and went to sleep.

***

Rory stood at the bar set up and searched the room for her friends. She had finally made it into the crowded party after latching onto a big beefy guy she knew from one of her classes, and following as he had pushed his way through the line of people outside. He had since gone in search of the pizza table and left her to her own devices.

The nap had done her good and she was ready to make a night of it. Although it was already after eight and campus rule dictated that all parties be broken up by one. Which, usually meant people either dispersed to little parties of their own or headed off campus.

She finally spotted Ryan and waved him over.

"Rory" he shouted as if he hadn't seen her for months.

"Ryan" she answered back, taking in his appearance, "You're drunk" she added.

"Me, never" he answered smiling, before continuing, "Ok I'll confess, I have partaken in a few beverages, but I'm fine".

"Sure you are" Rory stated laughing. She had experienced drunk Ryan before, and it was always entertaining. 

"So what's been happening here" she asked, pouring herself a drink of her own and taking a sip.

"Nothing much" he stated, "I saw your boyfriend out the back, and he too seemed to be enjoying himself, much like me".

"My boyfriend?" Rory replied confused.

"Yeah, you know tall blond guy, goes by the name of Trista" Ryan nonchalantly.

"He's not by boyfriend" Rory replied defensively, "We're barely friends" she added.

"Sure" Ryan answered disbelievingly.

"No not 'sure', we're not together, ok" Rory added getting frustrated.

"Well not now, but eventually you and him, you know…  
 Ryan replied smirking as he trailed off.

"No, not me and him. Not ever, it's not like that" Rory insisted.

"Fine, I believe you" Ryan replied, through his drunken state seeing that Rory was starting to get angry, "I'm sorry I mentioned it".

"That's ok" Rory replied calming down.

That stood there silently for a minute, before Ryan continued.

"Why is he such a touchy subject? I mean if I had said that about you and anyone else you would have probably laughed it off. But it seems every time I mention the guys name you freak out" Ryan asked seriously.

"I don't freak out" Rory said, "It's just I don't like people saying things about me that aren't true. And Tristan and I are just starting to be friends and I don't want people saying things like that about us. Believe me it's taken us a while to just get to the stage were we could be in the same room together".

"Ok, I'll stop" Ryan answered sincerely, "So you two are friends like you and I are friends".

"Well not yet, but one day maybe" Rory said relaxing and taking a sip from her drink.

"Hey I'll be back I just have to go to the restrooms" Ryan informed her sheepishly.

Rory nodded in reply and went about getting a refill.

***

Rory wondered outside and spotted some people from her floor.

"Hey" she greeted them relieved to see some familiar faces.

"Hey Rory" a girl named Emma, who lived two doors up from her replied.

"How's your…" she began before someone tapped her on the shoulder.

She turned around to face a smiling Tristan.

"You're here" he said goofily.

"Of course" Rory answered.

"Let's go for a walk" he added putting his arm around her shoulder and leading her away from the group over to a stoop on the porch. Rory went with him, waving bye to Emma and sitting down next to him.

"So Rory, I've been thinking and I think we should be friends" Tristan stated dramatically holding his beer up in the air.

"Sure, I've been thinking the same thing" Rory replied smiling, but slightly taken back with Tristan's line of questioning.

"Good, I just want to make it clear, you and I are friends. You know I never thought this day would have come" he continued slurring slightly.

"Why not?" Rory asked.

"Well because of the thing" he continued matter of factly.

"What thing?" 

"The fact that I…and you…and Paris…" Tristan added trailing off.

"You're not making any sense" Rory replied laughing.

"Oh well, doesn't matter, doesn't matter" he repeated, "Now we're good, and now is all that really matters".

"I couldn't agree more" Rory replied nodding.

"And you know we really do have a lot in common" Tristan stated turning to face her.

"We do?" She asked.

"Sure, we both like the same bands; hence the concert meeting, we both go to Yale…" Tristan began before Rory cut him off.

"Hell, I say lets skip the engagement and go straight to the honeymoon, it's obviously meant to be" she stated sarcastically.

"Hey don't mock, I really want to try this being friends with a girl thing. I've never done it before. Well I've done lots of things with girls…but never just friends".

"I think that's good" Rory said sincerely, "Maybe it means you're actually growing up, it's better late then never" she added.

Tristan nodded his head in agreement thoughtfully and then pulled out his phone.

"Ok Gilmore, to make this official you have to give me your number. And not in the sleezy what's your number context, but in the, were friends so we should be able to contact each other context" Tristan stated.

Rory repeated her mobile number out loud, as Tristan typed it in. 

Rory felt a sense of calm. It finally looked like her and Tristan were on their way to a healthy relationship, and the thought made her smile.

***

After Rory had excused herself from her meeting with Tristan, in order to search for a refill. The night had seemed to become a blur. Not a drunken haze blur, but all the people she had chatted to seemed to blend into one.

At this point she was looking for Ryan. She had been unable to find him and was starting to become concerned, given his earlier disposition.

She spotted his jean clad figure sprawled out on a couch in the corner, and made her way over to him.

His arm was shielding his eyes and he looked the worse for wear. Rory sat down over his legs on the end of the couch and poked him in the stomach in order to get his attention.

He looked up and her with what could only be described as a puppy dog expression.

"Hi you" he stated softly.

"Hi yourself, are you feeling okay?" Rory asked carefully.

"Not really" Ryan replied groggily.

"You want me to take you home" Rory continued.

"No, I'll be okay I just need to rest for a while" he returned.

"You want some company"

"That would be nice, if you don't mind hanging out with the drunkard in the corner" Ryan said sitting up.

"I don't mind" Rory stated, smiling.

They sat side by side and watched the party go on around them.

"Hey Rory, are you happy?" Ryan asked suddenly.

Rory was slightly taken back by this question, "Um, I guess so" she answered.

"Really" Ryan replied surprised, "Because I don't think I am" he continued.

"Why not", Rory asked concerned.

"Well" Ryan began quietly, "The thing is I don't want to be one of those people who just falls apart when their not is a relationship…"

"I know the feeling" Rory ventured, before letting Ryan go on.

"Yeah, see we all believe that we can be strong enough to stand alone. But ever since the break up I've just felt…I don't know…like I was putting on an act…like my life was on hold. And I've tried to find things to make me feel real again, I didn't tell you this but I hooked up with Celeste from downstairs last week and then this week I …"

"I get the picture" Rory interrupted not wanting to hear the details.

"Yeah, well. It all felt like nothing. And I was telling myself this is what you do, to get over someone, but it's not working" he finished.

"I don't know what to tell you" Rory replied, searching for an answer, "But I do want you to know that I'm here for you, anytime day or night".

"Thanks" Ryan replied slowly, "You know I actually believe that when you say that. Because you're you. Way to good to be friends with a loser like me".

"You're not a loser" Rory shot back irritated.

"Whatever you say" Ryan replied, not believing her. "You know you're way out of my league, I could never hook up with a girl like you".

"What are you talking about" Rory stated exasperated, "I have no league".

"Sure you don't" Ryan replied smirking.

"I don't" Rory said defensively, "You know my love life, when was the last time I even went out with someone"

"Yeah, but whose choice is that"

"Not mine, I'm hardly fending them off with a stick" Rory informed him lightly.

"That's because they're totally intimidated by you. You have no idea the vibe you give off" Ryan told her playing with his cuff.

"I don't vibe" Rory said indignantly.

"You so do. They look at you and you always seem so together and at peace. Like you don't need anyone else. Not to mention that you're gorgeous, all together it says I'm taken. By some guy who's a thousand times better then you'll ever be" Ryan said calmly.

"Shut up" Rory replied, "It that really how you see me?"

"Of course, but that doesn't mean I don't want to be friends with you and stand on the edges of the Rory universe" Ryan finished standing up, obviously starting to feel better.

"You are so full of crap tonight" Rory stated, getting up with him and shaking her head. 

"Whatever you say, your highness" Ryan replied helping her up.

To be continued…


	7. He needs the money

"Five more minutes" Lorelai called out from upstairs.

"If you don't come down soon, I'm so leaving without you" Rory called back.

"But I'm like…" Lorelai added, before being interrupted by her daughter.

"Cheese, I know, I've heard it before" Rory sighed laughing at her mothers much used line. It was Saturday night. Rory had been home since Friday, after she had met up with her Mom at her grandparents for dinner. It had been a relatively uneventful evening. Lorelai had had a good week at the Dragonfly and her Grandparents were too busy, excitedly showing them their pictures from their trip to Germany, to pick a fight. Overall it had been a nice night. That was until the very end of the evening, when Emily had graciously informed Rory that her presence would be much appreciated at the silent auction fundraiser she was hosting the following evening. Rory had of course felt that she was obligated to accept and thus her plans for a Saturday night TV marathon at home were over.

The entire trip home Lorelai had complained about her mothers tactics. The way she had lulled them into a false sense of security and them bang, at the last minute, suckered them into her world. She had neither less decided to come with Rory, to save her from her mothers crazy friends and to keep her company.

Rory had then spent Saturday sleeping in, having a late lunch at Luke's and managing to fit in some homework. A relatively uneventful day to recover from a hectic first week at school and prepare for what could be a very tiring evening.

"I'm ready" Lorelai stated dramatically as she swept done the stairs.

"And only half an hour late" Rory replied, as she headed for the door.

"Hey, if I'm going to sit through an evening of not-bidding on things I could never afford, I better look damn good doing it" Lorelai informed her grabbing her coat and trailing out after her.

"That is the Gilmore way" Rory finished, closing the door behind her.

***

"I'm bored" Lorelai stated, laying her head down on the table.

"Really" Rory replied, feigning surprise, "You've only told me that twenty-five times, and that's just in the last ten minutes".

"Well you made me stop writing down fake bids, ten minutes ago" Lorelai retorted.

 "Mom, it's for charity. And you writing down, David Letterman three hundred dollars, is not helping anyone" Rory informed her.

"It's helping me" Lorelai said, "Especially, when my Mother has to read out the winning bids, and she announces the king of late night television is the proud owner of a brand new pen and letter set".

"But what about the children" Rory mocked.

"What children? The so called charity is a Symphony, who cares, like they need another Oboe" Lorelai stated.

"The world needs music" Rory replied diplomatically.

"Yeah, well why don't they throw a bring MC Hammer out of bankruptcy fundraiser" Lorelai stated feigning seriousness, "Might as well through in Vanilla Ice in there too, because you know he needs the money".

"I think it's time we went home" Rory informed her mother, sensing the beginning of a rant, "You go warm up the car and I'll make our apologies to Grandma", she continued.

"Hallelujah, Praise the Lord" Lorelai replied excitedly, "Just tell her I came down with something", she shouted over her shoulder as she made her way towards the exit.

"Oh, you've come down with something alright" Rory mumbled under her breath as she went in search of her Grandparents.

***

"So you never did tell me how that party went on Thursday" Lorelai asked as they turned onto the interstate.

"It was good, Ryan was acting strange, but then again he'd had one two many cups of keg beer, if you know what I mean" Rory replied searching in her purse for some gum.

"Strange how?" Lorelai asked, intrigued.

"I don't know, he kept saying that Tristan and I were going to end up together and how I he hasn't really been happy since his break-up" Rory informed her.

"It's understandable about the break-up thing, considering how long they had been together. You just have to be there for him" Lorelai stated.

"I know, and I don't know how much of what he was saying was just drunken gloominess. I mean he seemed okay the next day, after he'd slept it off; although he didn't really want I talk about it"

"There's not much you can do. I know you always want to fix things but you lust have to let time do its thing" Lorelai finished, "As for his take on the Tristan situation, don't worry about it. You know there's nothing going on, so he's probably just seeing something that isn't there".

"You're right" Rory replied, glad to have a second opinion.

"So you and Ryan are still just friends?" Lorelai continued, somewhat suspiciously.

"Of course" Rory replied defensively.

"Good" Lorelai replied slowly, "Because now that he's single and you two are so close this year I just thought maybe…"

"God no. I mean you know when I first met him I thought he was cute and he still is, but now it's totally gone into friend territory" Rory stated.

"And do you think he feels that way too?" Lorelai questioned, as she pulled into the turn off into Stars Hollow.

"I'm sure he does" Rory replied somewhat unconvincingly, but wanting the topic to come to a close. It's not that she thought Ryan liked her or anything. But some of the things he had said the other night had confused her.

***

Later that night Rory pulled back the covers of her bed and hopped in exhausted. After their return from Hartford, they had attempted to make up for their missed night of relaxation by watching season one of The Office back to back, which was followed by Lorelai swearing she was going marry Ricky Gervais.

Rory was about to switch off her phone when she decided to quickly call Ryan, just to make sure he was okay and there were no problems at the dorm.

"Hey Rory" he answered on the second ring.

"Hey, I was just checking to make sure everything's going well in New Haven"

"It's all good here" he replied cheerfully, "I'm actually at The Crow, you know that  bar off campus near the good pizza place. Your friend Tristan and some of the guys off of our floor are here, and I have to say we're having a pretty awesome time"

"That's good" Rory replied sincerely, glad Ryan seemed to be having fun but somewhat disconcerted that Ryan and Tristan were out together. Although she didn't know why she should be? It made sense, they were in many ways very similar, not to mention the fact there weren't that many juniors on their floor.

"So I'll see you tomorrow" Rory finished as she said goodbye and hung up.

She rolled over and turned off her bedside lamp and almost immediately fell asleep.

To be continued…


	8. Just like old times

Rory wandered away from the coffee shop, extra large latte in hand. She was killing time before her next class. Although she lived on campus, her dorm was way over the other side of the school. And after racing to the library in order to secure the books she needed in order to complete her reading and then back to the student center to pick up the daily paper she had subscribed too, she only had five minutes until her next class started.

Although classes had started the previous week, the particular English seminar she had signed up for didn't start until this week. Rory began to feel slightly anxious at the thought. Although she was in her third year, the first time you walked into any new class was still slightly nerve racking. It was a whole group of people you had maybe never laid eyes on, as well as some esteemed professor who would intimidate you with his presence. Not to mention the fact he had written a doctorate on the topic he would probably end up assigning you on as an essay.

The campus bells rang signaling the hour, and Rory quickly made her way to the room the timetable had scheduled her.

She peered her head in and hoped that there hadn't been a last minute scheduling change.

'Tragedy and the classical word" she asked a girl sitting by the door, head buried in notes. "Uh huh" the girl mumbled without looking up.

"Okay" Rory stated under her breath, sliding into a table near the back.

The professor was yet to arrive, so Rory glanced around the room. She spotted some familiar faces, but no one she was really acquainted with.

She set her folder out in front of her and sat patiently, looking at the course guide that had been sitting on the table.

A voice over her shoulder broke her concentration. She turned around to see a grinning Tristan standing over her.

"Just like old times, Mary" he said smiling.

"Huh" Rory replied, confused but glad to see a familiar face.

"You and me in class together, it's been too long," he stated, occupying the seat next to her.

"You're right" she returned smiling, "But what are you doing here, it doesn't seem very businessy to me".

"Elective" he stated simply, "And it looked interesting, Greek tragedy appeals to me"

"Why am I not surprised" Rory retorted.

Tristan opened up his cord messenger bag and laid his books on the table.

"So I heard you and Ryan went out the other night" Rory stated, matter of factly.

"Oh yeah, he's just so cute, I couldn't resist myself" Tristan replied camply, "Actually, we just went to a few bars with Ben and Rick from down the hall, no big deal, he's a nice guy" Tristan told her, searching in his bag for a pen.

"I know he's a nice guy," Rory returned.

"So how was your weekend, Ryan said you went home?"Tristan asked, finely finding a half chewed black one, right at the bottom of his back.

"Yeah, it was good. Except my Grandma dragged me and my Mom to some charity silent auction in Hartford and I spent the whole night stopping my Mom from making a scene" she informed him laughing.

"Sounds fun" Tristan replied, " I actually think my parents were there too, my mum phoned and said that they would have to move my pool table in order to fit in the antique writing desk".

Rory was surprised at how easily they were conversing.

The entrance of the professor put a stop to any further conversation. He placed his books on the table and began the class.

He went over the requirements for assessment and the texts on the syllabus. Rory was pleasantly surprised to find that she had read most of them, something that would no doubt lessen the study load.

"Rory" Tristan whispered, trying to catch her attention.

"What?" she replied in a hushed voice.

"My pens not working" he returned, demonstrating on the page.

Rory discreetly, opened her bag and fished one out for him.

"You're my hero," he returned, jokingly.

"Just call me Wonder…" she began before being cut off by a voice from the front of the room.

"Why don't I just stop and let you finish your conversation?" The Professor stated sardonically.

"Who, me?" Rory replied.

"Yes you" he retuned glaring her down. 

"I'm sorry" Rory stated, beginning to turn red, as the whole class turned around to face her.

"In the future, do your flirting in your own free time, instead of wasting ours" the Professor finished, before resuming his lecture.

Rory looked down pretending to concentrate on her notes, ignoring Tristan's smirking glance.

Eventually, after what seemed like an eternity, the class was dismissed and they all filled out the door.

Once they were clear of the room, Rory hit Tristan softly on the shoulder.

"What was that for?" he sated surprised, pretending to rub his shoulder as if she had actually hurt him.

"You totally got me in trouble in there, and now the Professor hates me. For the rest of semester I'm going to be the talking girl" Rory stated exasperated, as they walked along the path to the center of campus.

"Hey you were the one flirting with me," he returned, smirking.

"I was not" Rory replied defensively, "You started it".

"I needed a pen, what was I supposed to do, scratch out the notes with my fingernail" he stated dramatically.

"Bring more then one pen," she returned, searching for a comeback.

"Well we can't all be as prepared as you," he said searching in his pockets for some change, "Look I'll buy you a coffee as a peace offering" he added.

"Okay, you've found my weakness, your forgiven" Rory stated smiling.

"But lets go to the good coffee place, over by the library, not the crappy one near the bookshop" Rory informed him leading him onto the right path.

'I know, their cups are like paper, not only do you burn your hand, sometimes they actually collapse mid drink" Tristan, stated agreeing with her.

"You certainly know a lot about the coffee here, considering you've only been here a few weeks" Rory replied, surprised.

"Hey, I am a college student. How else are you meant to get through 8am classes?" Tristan stated knowingly.

"Pills, alcohol or the ability to sleep while keeping your eyes open" Rory ventured, as they lined up at the coffee place of choice.

"As if you would ever sleep through class, I bet you haven't even skipped any classes the whole two years you've been here," he stated.

'Hey I'm wild, once I arrived to a lecture a half hour late" she informed him, proudly.

"Slept in?" he guessed.

"No, I was studying in the library and lost track of time" she retuned sheepishly.

Tristan laughed as they finally placed their orders.

To be continued…


	9. I'm never slutty

On Thursday night, Rory rolled over in her bed attempting to sleep. From the hallway she could faintly hear the noises of people, coming and going. Although it was the designated party night of the week. Rory had decided to skip it, in favour of an early night, something she desperately needed. The week had started with her English class; the one Tristan was also taking and where the professor now hated her, and only gone down hill from there.

As she was about to drift off, she heard a beep from her phone, alerting her to an incoming message. Sighing she rolled over to check it. Tristan's name lit up the screen.

"Are you coming tonight?" it read.

Rory quickly replied, "No, sleeping. But if you are, have fun. Try not to get too drunk or be too slutty, but if you do and are. I want the Goss! Night."

She smiled as she typed it out. Tristan and her relationship was really coming along. She was even starting to relax around him. The beep of the phone alerted her to the fact he had replied.

"Too bad. Hey I'm never slutty! Are you busy this weekend?"

"Not really, what did you have I mind" Rory sent back.

"Movie?" he replied a second later.

"Cool, stop by tomorrow and we'll work out the details" she typed, finishing the correspondence.

So she and Tristan were going to the movies together, just the two of them. The thought made her nervous for a second. But this is what you did with friends. It was just different, Ryan had really been the first guy she had been friends with, no strings attached. He was off limits so it had been easy. But she had Tristan where both single, a fact that shouldn't matter but even so… She shook of her apprehension ad decided that it was nothing to worry about. It was just a movie, with a friend nothing more.

***

"So" Tristan started, apprehensively as they exited the cinema.

"So" Rory replied unsure of what to say, "That movie made no sense," she continued.

"I know" he shot back; relieved he wasn't alone in his confusion.

"But Owen Wilson was cute" she replied smiling as she dumped the empty popcorn container in the trashcan.

"Hey that chick wasn't bad either," he returned.

"Yeah, she was just your type, tall, blond and easy" Rory quipped.

"Hey, I take offence to that statement" Tristan replied, feigning annoyance "I don't have a type to speak off, I'm an equal opportunity sleazebag" he added.

"Can you believe that was written by the same guy who wrote Get Shorty" Rory theorised as they made their way back to Tristan's car.

"I know, that's why I though it would be good, I take total responsibility for choosing the movie" Tristan said, walking over to his side "Next time you can choose".

"Next time?" Rory asked closing her door.

"Sure, I think it went okay. No one got hurt" he replied.

"Yet" Rory stated dramatically, as they pulled back out onto the crowded street.

"So what now?" he asked as they stopped at an intersection.

"Whatever, it's still early" Rory replied checking her watch, it was barely eleven.

"I've got an idea," Tristan returned mysteriously.

"What?" Rory replied, smiling.

"You'll just have to wait and see" he smiled back, turning right.

"Fine be that way" Rory replied, crossing her arms and pretending to pout.

"I will," he stated, checking the street signs.

They slowly made there way out of the main portion of town, toward the housing estates that surrounded it. Rory had no idea where they were headed, but decided to just let him have his fun.

"Were here" he informed her, pilling up on the curb and stopping the car.

They were parked at the bottom of a hill with an old water tower and lookout at its peak. As soon as Rory got out of the car she could see why Tristan had taken her there. From their vantage point they could see almost all of New Haven and the surrounding area. The lights made out some kind of star like map.

Tristan made his way up the hill and Rory followed.

"Hey slow down" she called after him, "Not all of us go to the gym five days a week".

"Two at the most" he called back, stopping to let her catch up.

"You know I heard some crazy rumour that there was a gym on campus" Rory theorised as they walked side by side.

"And you say you've been here for three years" Tristan retorted.

"It's a big place" Rory replied as they finally made it to the lookout.

They stood in silence for a moment taking in the view.

"How'd you know about this place?" Rory asked catching her breath.

Tristan shrugged his shoulders in reply, "Around".

After they had taken in the view. They sat down on a bench.

"It's weird" Rory began, "How when you go travelling somewhere you go and see all of the tourist attractions and all of these place but at home you ignore them".

"Hey to me, New Haven still feels like a strange place" He replied, staring out at the horizon.

"How are things going for you, I keep forgetting that you only got here this year, it feels like forever" Rory replied thoughtfully. And she meant it. She was slowly getting used to Tristan being around so much. In her classes, in her dorm, friends with her friends.

"It's been fine" her stated, "And the fact that its not that far from Hartford means that there's a lot of familiar face… and then there's you" he finished.

Rory started at him unsure of what that statement meant.

"It's just…I'm really glad that were friends, it's made the transition so much easier" he explained.

"Oh" she answered.

"Ok top five bands" Rory said suddenly.

"Weezer" Tristan shot back immediately, "Goldfinger, Longwave, Johnny Cash and The Beach Boys" he added.

"Very eclectic" Rory replied.

'You" he asked.

"There's too many too name" Rory replied, thinking, " Ash of course um…The Clash, The Shins… the list goes on"

"You know I actually don't know that much about you" Tristan said suddenly.

'What do you mean?" Rory replied, confused.

"I know where you're from, the basic deal with your family and that you actually have pretty good taste in music for a girl…"

'Thankyou" Rory interrupted.

"But I don't really know that much about you, what actually goes on inside that exterior of perfect Maryness"

"Well what about you" Rory retorted ignoring his last comment and dodging the question.

"You actually want to know about me, I thought you had me all figured out" Tristan smirked.

"I mean besides the 'Tristan' attitude" Rory shot back.

"Well…I was depressed last year, for a while, I just didn't want to face everything anymore" Tristan informed her slowly, not making eye contact.

"What happened?" Rory replied concerned, but unsure of how to reply

" I don't know…one day I just snapped out of it. I was driving along listening to AC/DC and I just decided to get on with it" he finished, matter of factly.

"I'm glad you did" Rory replied, sincerely.

"So back to you, tell me a secret about you that no one else knows" Tristan asked.

"There's nothing to tell" Rory replied, smiling.

"There must be," he stated, "We can't be friends if you won't trust me".

"I…" Rory began before stopping, " I'm not sure I do trust you yet".

Tristan took in her words before standing up and making his way down the hill.

'Time to take you home, Gilmore" he shouted over his shoulder.

Rory followed slightly taken back.

To be continued….


	10. You’d be surprised

It had been over a week since Rory and Tristan had gone to the movies. They had seen each other around the dorm and in class and neither had mentioned there conversation on the hill. They had kept it light, both saying they had had fun and should do it again.

Rory was glad Tristan hadn't tried to pry her to open up again. She was sorry that she had said it so bluntly, but it was how she felt. She liked Tristan, she wanted to hang around him, but she wasn't ready to share her inner most thoughts with him.

If she was honest she really didn't want to share those with anyone, except maybe her Mom, but there were even some things that she didn't know. 

Rory didn't know what it was that made her feel like this, logically she guessed that it may have something to do with the way things ended with Jess. She had tried to be open with him and he had left. Although she didn't want to think that he had damaged her indefinitely, she couldn't dismiss it as a possibility.

Rory tried to let go of these thoughts. It was a Monday afternoon and she had finished class for the day. She had made tentative plans with Tristan to take him to her favourite taco place, the one she had discovered with Lorelai on her first ever trip to Yale. He had yet to experience it and Rory had insisted that they couldn't really be friends until he did.

The knock on her door signalled that Tristan was ready to go, and she got up to let him in.

"Hey, how were classes" she asked casually as she grabbed a jacket.

"Fine, as interesting as a business communications subject can be" he answered sitting on her bed, "I mean who doesn't know how to write a letter, or give a presentation to a group of people", he added.

"Well, not everyone is as self assured as you" Rory replied, searching for her purse, "Some people get nervous".

"Hey, I get nervous, just not in relation to school work" he replied, as they left the room and made there way out to the parking lot.

"When have you ever been nervous" Rory asked sceptically.

"You'd be surprised" he stated simply, putting an end to the conversation.

***

They finished there meal, after which Tristan conceded that it was the best Mexican food he had ever had, and headed to a nearby record store to browse.

They wandered separately each occasionally calling the other over to show them something.

Rory found an old Pete Yorn album for half price and was tempted to buy it.

"Look how cheap this is?" She stated holding it up for Tristan to see the price tag.

"Who's Pete Yorn?" he replied.

"Only Rolling Stones best new act of 2001" Rory replied, unbelievably.

"You are such a music geek" he shot back, smirking.

"Hey, you try being friends with a dedicated audiophile for ten years and see how you come out" Rory told him.

Rory put it back, and began looking around.

"Aren't you going to get it" he asked surprised.

"If I get it I won't have enough money for mini golf" she replied disappointedly, thinking ahead to the next thing they had planned to do. A plan that had come about when they had passed Joe's Putt Putt and Tristan had started acting like a four year old, and going on about how he hadn't played mini golf in years.

"Okay, let's make a deal, you get the CD and I'll pay for golf this time" he informed her, "You can shout me next time" he continued.

"Does that mean we have to play mini golf again? " Rory asked feigning irritation, but smiling at the same time. 

"Or you could pay me off some other way" he added cheekily.

"You wish" Rory shot back.

"Every night in my dreams' he shot back smirking and leading her to the counter.

***

After golf, they walked back to Tristan's car and decided to head back to the dorms.

Rory smiled to herself as she thought about how fun it had been. She had actually felt relaxed around Tristan, who despite his boasting wasn't actually that good at mini golf. Rory had actually beaten him, although he protested that that was just because the club was too short for him and that she was just lucky.

"What are you doing" he asked as he started the car, as Rory put her new CD in his stereo.

"What does it look like I'm doing" Rory replied sarcastically, but continuing on.

"It looks like you're touching my stereo" he shot back.

"So?" Rory replied, pressing play.

"My car, my stereo, my music" he stated, turning the music off.

"Please" Rory stated looking at him and pouting her lip.

"Don't give me that look" Tristan replied smirking, "Or I'm playing AC/DC at full volume, the whole way home', he threatened.

"Fine" Rory replied, taking out her CD, "Be that way, besides I like AC/DC. You've obviously never been on a road trip with my Mom".

Tristan smiled in return. and happily put in his CD.

Rory suddenly remembered the thing Tristan had told her the other night. About how he had been depressed last year. She contemplated bringing it up. She had thought later about how she should have said something different, he had been confiding in her and all she had returned was that she was glad he was fine now. She hadn't even asked what had made him feel that way. 

"Tristan…" she began but he beat her too it.

"Speaking of road trips" he started, "That's what I'm going to do at the end of this year, or sooner if an opportunity comes up" he continued.

"Sounds cool, where too?" she asked relieved that she hadn't had the chance to say anything.

"I' don't know, everywhere…or nowhere" he answered, "I was thinking about heading south, going through Graceland, Roswell all the tourist traps. I mean I've done the whole Europe thing but I've never really seen my own country". 

"I know what you mean" Rory replied, thinking similar thoughts but slightly surprised that it would be the kind of thing Tristan would want to do.

To be continued…


	11. An exploding turkey incident

Rory returned home from winter break, and set her bag down on her bed. Just as she was contemplating unpacking, Tristan burst into the room.

"You're back" He stated nonchalantly, sitting down on her bed.

"You too" she replied, matching his tone, "How was your break?" she added.

"Fine, same old thing" he answered sighing, "You?".

"Well aside from an exploding turkey incident, it was pretty uneventful" Rory laughed to herself as she set her laptop up on her desk.

"Good to hear" Tristan replied, "Hey I burnt you that Rooney CD" he continued, tossing it to her.

"Thanks" She replied after making an unsuccessful catch, and picking the case up from the floor.

She was somewhat surprised that he had remembered her asking for it, as it had been in passing during one of their somewhat heated discussions on music. Which always begun with Rory lamenting that the emo phenomenon had turned Weezer into a punch line and ending with both of them agreeing that they would at least both never like nu metal.

It was typical of their relationship. Over the past few months they had build up an understanding. They went to the movies together practically every week, spent hours discussing the most mundane subjects and occasionally hung out at parties. But that was it. After that night on the hill, Tristan hadn't tried to venture any further in the mysteries of Rory Gilmore. And she was happy that way.

Although they had grown closer on many levels, they had kept things light. This in turn managed to confuse most of their friends and half of the floor.

Rory was only too aware that there where rumours doing the rounds that she and Tristan had been going at it for months. The current one being that he had transferred to Yale for her, but they had kept it a secret as she was his RA. It was of course all crap, but there was no use worrying about it. A denial would just fuel the fire.

They actually didn't really talk about it between them. The subject of relationships past or present had dropped out of their vocabulary. It just wasn't something she felt comfortable talking to him about. It wasn't like she was seeing anyone, far from it, but it had just sort of become a no go zone.

Whatever the status of their friendship, Rory knew that it was important to her.

"Rory…" Tristan stated loudly interrupting her thoughts.

"Huh" she replied.

"I was just telling you that Ryan got back yesterday too" he informed her.

"Sorry, I spaced out" She admitted turning her full attention back to him, "How is he?"

"Why don't you go ask him yourself, if he's up yet, we kind of had a big night last night. He took me to this little Irish pub in town" Tristan informed her laughing, "Let me tell you, never drink Guinness, you're just asking for trouble".

"I don't know if I like you too spending so much time together" Rory said, smiling back, "I don't think you're a good influence on each other".

"Don't worry, we just spent the whole night talking about you" he retuned.

"Yeah right, because there's just so much to talk about on that topic" Rory shot back laughing.

* * *

"So where's Tristan" Ryan asked shouting into Rory's ear in an attempt to be heard over the music.

Rory shrugged her shoulders in reply. She and Ryan had come down to a local bar to see the local college cover band, the drummer of who was in one of Ryan's classes.

She had seen Tristan in passing and waved at him across the room but that was the extent of their contact.

"Fresh air" Rory mouthed to Ryan and he nodded in reply, leading her out into the bar's outdoor area.

"So the bands pretty good, who knew Dan could actually play" Rory stated, shoving her hands in her coat pockets in an attempt to keep warm.

"Not me" Ryan replied, he paused before continuing "Hey… why do you and Tristan act like you hardly know each other at parties?".

"What do you mean?" Rory replied, confused.

"I mean, you guys hang out all the time back at school, but as soon as we're in a social setting you guys go right back to the start of semester" he theorised.

"That's not true" Rory replied defensively, "I mean…I don't know. I see him enough back at campus and we just do our own thing when we go out, what's wrong with that?"

"Nothing" Ryan replied trying to stay out of her business, "But I hope it's not because you care about what people are saying".

"I don't" she shot back immediately.

"Unless it's true?" Ryan said cheekily.

Rory hit him light-heartedly.

"Were friends, that's it okay, so lay off" Rory replied trying to finish the conversation.

"If that's what you think" he teased back.

"I'm getting another drink" Rory said exasperated, as they headed back inside.

* * *

"Hey wait up" a voice called as Ryan and Rory hailed a cab that was pulling up outside the bar.

"Room for one more" Tristan asked.

"For you always" Ryan answered.

Tristan wandered around to the other side of the car and hopped in. Rory slid into the middle and Ryan followed.

Ryan gave the driver the directions to the next bar they were headed too, where they had promised to meet some of their friends.

Rory's head felt heavy as they entered the traffic.

"We're headed to this little place downtown called Aries, you in" Ryan asked Tristan.

"Sure, I guess" he replied.

After a short ride, they pulled up on the curb outside the bar. Ryan got out first and paid the driver.

Rory started to get out but stopped halfway when her head began spinning.

"Uh Ryan I don't fell so good" she said abruptly.

"Actually you look a little pale" he replied, suddenly concerned, "Do you want me to take you home?"

"Uh huh" Rory replied unable to muster a full sentence.

"Hey why don't you go ahead" Tristan interrupted, "I'll take Gilmore home, I'm actually kind of tired myself" he added.

"Thanks" Ryan replied relived, "I'll see you two tomorrow", he waved as the cab pulled back onto the street

Rory rested her head on Tristan's shoulder and they travelled in silence for a few minutes.

"So it looks like someone's had a few too many this fine evening" Tristan stated smirking.

"Shh...head…hurts" Rory mumbled, trying to get comfortable on his shoulder.

"Okay" he whispered, "But you have to admit this is kind of funny, me taking a drunk Rory back to the dorm, talk about role reversal".

"Hey" Rory replied lifting her head slightly "I'm pretty sure I saw you knocking back a couple of beers yourself".

"Checking up on me were you, Mary" he replied raising his eyebrow, "What can I say, some people can just hold their alcohol better then others".

"Not the Mary thing again… if I could be bothered lifting my arm I'd hit you" She mumbled.

"You know you love it" he replied casually putting his arm around her shoulder.

"Yeah right" she returned shifting her head to get comfortable again.

They pulled up in front of their dorm and Tristan helped her from the car. They made their way back up to their floor.

Tristan led Rory to her room supporting her weight as he opened the door.

He set her down on her bed and she immediately lay down, almost falling asleep.

"You going to me okay?" he asked softly.

Rory nodded in reply and rolled over.

"Hey Tristan" she mumbled grabbing his hand as he got up from the bed.

"Yeah" he replied sitting down again.

"Were friends right?" She asked looking up at him expectantly

He looked at her for a minute before nodding, "We are if you want us to be?"

She nodded and closed her eyes softly.

"Night" he stated softly, leaning down and gently kissing her forehead before turning and leaving, quietly shutting the door behind him.

To be continued


	12. Not the same since Timmy left

"Tristan" Rory asked as she entered his room. Which he had, as usual, left the door open too.

The room was empty, but she decided to sit down on the bed anyway. She knew he got out of classes at three, so she decided to just wait for him.

Rory had woken up this morning feeling like she'd been hit by a truck, and not really remembering what had happened.

Over a fast-food breakfast, that Ryan had insisted would settle her stomach, she learnt that it had been Tristan who had taken a "more than tipsy" Rory, in Ryan's words, back to the dorms.

That was why she was looking for him, just to say thanks, and apologise if she had said anything embarrassing.

She wandered over to his desk and scanned the books sitting on it. A worn copy of Catcher in the Rye caught her eye, and she smiled to herself because it was such a cliché book for Tristan to have and love. As she picked it up a letter fell out.

She picked it up of off the floor and then paused. She shouldn't look at it, it might be personal, she thought.

But curiosity got the best of her. It's not like she was snooping or anything, it just happened to fall on the ground, she surmised.

She quietly closed the door and sat down on Tristan's bed, determined to just have a quick glance.

It read

_So I'm kind of drunk, and shouldn't be aloud to express my self at this point, but no ones stopping me so here goes. I've liked the same girl for as long as I can remember, yet she is totally oblivious. Well maybe not that I like her but just how deep those feeling run. Problem is, we'd never work. At least she'd never let it. To be fair I can't make a move for many reasons. One possibly being the rejection would most likely send me spiralling. Two the fact that she is totally out of my league and three the fact that she has a boyfriend, who by all accounts can treat her better then I ever could. All it all, I should just get over it and believe me I'm trying but the thing is the more you tell yourself not to do or feel something the faster it grows. At least now I don't have to see her anymore so at least there's some solace in my new situation._

Rory processed the words in front of her. Immediately feeling guilty that she had stumbled upon something so personal.

But then her mind leapt into action. A part of her became curious, was this why Tristan had really left North Carolina? There was some girl there that he was head over heels in love with, who he, Mr Player himself thought was out of his league? The realisation that Tristan possessed some insecurity was kind of appealing. And who was this girl that thought she was too good for him, Tristan was definitely a catch. But as she processed it further, there was another feeling that overtook her.

Was it some kind of disappointment? Deep down Rory felt a kind of let down. Not that she thought Tristan liked her. Well maybe she had to admit he may have at some point, way back, but the fact he was totally devoted to some other girl made her feel something. All she knew was that she had really come to appreciate Tristan in her life and for some reason this confession made him feel less to her, if that made sense.

Rory quickly got up and put the letter back where it had been. She was about to leave when Tristan came barging in.

"Hey" he stated, obviously surprised too see her.

"Um, hi' Rory replied slightly flustered, nervously glancing towards the bookcase.

"Okay" Tristan stated suspiciously, "So what, you decided you where sick of your own room and want to come stay in mine, because you're welcome too, but I must warn you there's a queue"

Rory rolled her eyes, regaining her composure, "I was just going to thank you for taking me home last night", she stated lightly.

"Hey, there's no need to thank me, you more then made it up to me to me once we got back to the dorm, if you know what I mean" Tristan smirked.

"Shut up, you're so full of it" Rory laughed, despite herself, "So I better go" she added, making to leave.

"Hey, hang out, we can watch Passions" Tristan joked, "I think evil Charity's making a return today"

"It's sad that you actually know what's going on in that show, besides it's just not the same since Timmy left" Rory shot back.

"Hah, like you can talk, so stay?" he replied

"Yeah, well, some of us actually have work to do" Rory finished wanting to get out of there.

"You're such a Geek" Tristan shouted at her, as she closed the door on her way out.

Rory leaned against the door for a moment, gathering her thoughts. She would just have to forget what she read. She should never have seen it in the first place. If he wanted to talk to her about it that was up to him but it was really none of her business.

And with that she decided to go see what Ryan was up too.


	13. It's not pink pink

"Okay your turn… Mrs Hollander from the dining hall or that creepy lady who hangs around outside the psych building" Rory asked as she took a sip of her drink.

"That's not fair, I was giving you nice ones" Ryan replied frustrated

"Choose?" Rory shot back, not letting him get away with it.

They were sitting at a pizza place, playing the either or game. Which was very similar to the 1, 2, 3 he's yours game Rory and her mother had invented. This one consisted of picking two people at random and having the other decide which one they would rather hook up with. A choice that would then be mocked for some time after.

After much deliberation, Ryan finally proceeded to choose, Mrs Hollander, justifying that she was actually quite nice for a middle aged woman with a mole the size of a Texas on her nose.

"Hey there's Trista" Ryan informed her.

Rory looked up to see Tristan walking in with Josh from their floor. He made his way over to a table in the corner without seeing them.

"Want to go say hi" Ryan asked making to get up.

"Maybe later' Rory replied, motioning for him to stay.

"Okay" Ryan replied, grabbing some pizza, "Did you two have a fight or something?"

"No" she replied, "I just can't be bothered talking to him at the moment".

"That's cool" Ryan stated, and then began smiling, "Speaking of Trista, How about who would you choose, Trista or Josh?"

"That's not fair" Rory replied.

"Why not, not that I notice or anything but from what I can gather they are two pretty nice looking guys" Ryan retorted grinning mischievously.

'Whatever, but that goes against the rules of either/or, that is the people in the decision can not be present at the time, thus avoiding any embarrassment" Rory stated.

'No, no, no, that was just to avoid people playing the game being involved in the hypothetical, Tristan is all the way over the other side of the room, he can't hear what's going on therefore the rule is irrelevant" Ryan retorted.

Rory crossed her arms, defiant.

"Answer the question, Rory" Ryan joked doing his best Judd Nelson impression.

"Fine, I guess… Tristan, Josh has already made out with half of the campus and I wouldn't want to be added to the list" Rory justified her answer.

"Interesting…So I guess that means you like Tristan" Ryan replied, feigning seriousness.

"I do not" She replied exasperated.

Ryan chooses to ignore her, "So you like him and he likes you, time for a bit of matchmaking" Ryan joked.

"I'm just going to ignore you" Rory retorted, throwing a straw at Ryan, "Beside's I'm a hundred percent sure he doesn't like me, he likes someone else"

"How do you now that, did he tell you?" Ryan asked

"I…just know, so can we drop..." Rory replied seriously, before Ryan interrupted her

"Speak of the devil" he stated, as Tristan came over to the table.

"Talking about me were you" Tristan returned cockily, "All good things, I hope"

"We were just wondering when you and Josh were going to come out in the open about your relationship" Ryan stated.

"Well you know we'd love to but, were just afraid society not ready for us yet" Tristan returned, pretending to be upset.

"How's it going" Ryan inquired.

"Good, yourself" He returned politely.

"Okay, just that time of the year where there's tons of work to do" Ryan returned.

Tristan nodded in agreement, "Mary, haven't seen you while" he added, turning his attention to Rory who was sitting quietly, staring into her soda.

"I know I just haven't known what too do with my self without your constant interruptions" she replied light heartedly.

"Harsh" he replied, raising an eyebrow, "You know it's all out of love"

Rory rolled her eyes in return, and after exchanging a few more pleasantries Tristan returned to his table.

"Okay…that was…weird" Ryan stated.

"Don't know what you mean" Rory replied ending the conversation.

* * *

Once again Thursday night rolled around, and, once again somewhere on campus the "party to end all parties" was taking place.

For once Rory didn't need much convincing to get into the spirit of things. She had had a hard week to say the least, and the idea of knocking back a few a few fruity concoctions did not sound that unappealing.

After throwing on an old pair of jeans and a simple black top, she went to her dresser and started applying her standard amount of going out make-up. Which was relatively similar to her during the day make-up, which pretty much looked like she wasn't wearing much, a look that took a surprising amount of effort?

After she had finished, she stared at her reflection. She looked fine, she concluded. Actually, she pretty much looked like she always did, a fact that suddenly didn't sit that well with her.

For some reason tonight felt different. Out of the corner of her eye she spotted the low cut, light green wrap top, she had brought under Lorelai's insistence. Something she swore she would never wear, but her mom and snuck into her suitcase. She decided to go with it; along with the new jeans she had brought on the same day.

After dressing and adding the blue and green crystal earrings she had picked up at the university flea market. She then decided it was a waste not to use the matching eye shadow that had been a stocking stuffer and was ready to go.

She knocked on Ryan's door which he immediately opened.

"Someone looks nice" he stated, smiling.

"This old thing" she replied modestly.

"Ready to go" he asked grabbing his jacket.

"Don't I look ready" she stated.

"Very ready" he replied, suggestively.

"Hey it's not that revealing" Rory replied indignantly, "Chelsea from downstairs would wear this to class".

"Yeah, but Chelsea from downstairs is a slut" he shot back

Rory hit him, exasperated, "Ryan Alexander you are such a…such a…guy"

"Why thankyou, Lorelai Leigh, you're very much …a girl…at least that's what that top is telling me" he responded as he ran off down the hallway.

"Come back you little perve" she shouted heading off after him.

* * *

After play fighting for the short walk over, Ryan and Rory entered the party to the sound of 'The Killers', blasting out of the speakers.

"Well as least the music doesn't suck" Ryan shouted in Rory's ear over the noise.

"Just wait until the engineering students get hold of the stereo, behold the torture that is Nickleback" Rory replied, leading them towards the bar.

After ordering their drinks, they headed for a nearby table.

"So any idea if Tristan's coming" Rory asked lightly.

"Not sure, maybe" he replied not pressing it.

Rory nodded in reply. Things between the two of them were pretty much back to normal. They had joked around in class, and hung out with Ryan together but aside from that not much else.

She decided that tonight, if she saw him she would try to act like everything was normal. And forget about the letter and anything else she had thought. Their friendship was important and that was all that mattered. And if she kept acting so distant, that might be in jeopardy.

* * *

After splitting up from Ryan to have a look around, Rory had gotten stuck in a corner talking to a guy who insisted they had been in a Shakespeare class together last year and had proceeded to sprout sonnets to her. She had finally managed to escape, only to realise that maybe her top hadn't been such a good idea, if the reaction of some guys from her politics class had been anything to go by, and had gone in search of Ryan.

She finally found him deep in conversation with Tristan.

"Hey guys" she greeted them.

"Helloooo Mary" Tristan exclaimed, taking in her appearance.

She lightly tapped him on the cheek, smiling despite herself. It seemed that after a few drinks that reaction wasn't as offensive.

"Now now, there's no need to be immature Trista" Ryan informed him, pretending to be offended.

"I'm just saying, I wouldn't let our little Rory wander around by her self looking like that, not all guys are as sensitive and respectful as us" Tristan explained, smirking.

"True" Ryan agreed.

"Well I guess one of you will just have to protect me" Rory ventured.

"I'll be your Kevin Costner" Tristan volunteered.

"It's a deal" Rory replied rasing her empty cup, "Let's shake on it" She added holding out her hand.

Tristan took it and lightly kissed it.

"That's not a shake" Rory stated, pulling her hand back.

"Sorry couldn't resist, besides we all know what happens with bodyguards in the end" he smirked.

Choosing to ignore that comment, Rory sat down.

"So are you two having fun?" she asked.

"More now that you're here" Tristan informed her, finishing off his beer, "So why don't you accompany be to the bar, as I owe Ryan a drink and I can't help but notice that whatever light weight lemonade looking drink you had, is also in need of a refill".

Rory nodded and waved at Ryan as she followed Tristan towards the bar.

"Hey I'm not a light weight" Rory replied once they got in line, pouting her lip.

"You most certainly are, need I remind you of a certain incident were I had to drag your sorry ass home" he shot back.

"Oh yeah" she replied sheepishly.

"What do you want?" he asked as the made there way to the front of the quae.

"Tequila, straight up" she replied indignantly.

"Playing with the big boys" Tristan teased, before obeying and ordering a round of tequilas and chasers.

They carried their drinks back to their table were Ryan was deep in conversation with the aforementioned, Chelsea from downstairs.

"Cheers" Tristan pronounced holding up his shot, Rory responded and shot back her drink. Savouring the slice of lemon that had accompanied it, and ignoring the spinning sensation in her head.

"You better be careful Gilmore, because the rate I'm going I may not be able to carry you home this time" Tristan replied, downing half his beer.

* * *

"I seriously can't believe Ryan sometimes" Rory stated as she leaned against the wall next to Tristan

They had moved into a quieter room, after Ryan had gone upstairs with Chelsea to "talk" and the poetry sprouting guy had returned.

"What do you mean?" he asked, resting his cup on a sideboard.

"Just before we came, he was totally ragging on Chelsea…and now he's all over her" Rory stated exasperated.

"Guys will be guys, why Jealous?" he shot back.

"No…Ryan's just a friend, as I believe I have told you many times" she informed him.

"Just teasing" he smirked back, "You're so easy, Mary".

"Hah, you'd gone a whole ten minuted without using the M word and there you go, you just can't help yourself" Rory replied, laughing at how predictable he was.

"Not when I'm around you, all control goes out the window" he shot back.

"So did I tell you how nice you look tonight" Tristan added.

"Your not so bad yourself" Rory replied, "although you do know that top is pink"

"It's not pink pink, it's light pink, besides I'm secure enough in my own masculinity to carry of any colour" he shot back defensively.

"Thankyou Carson" she responded, smiling.

"So… I was thinking we should go see a movie on Saturday if you're free?" Tristan stated out of the blue.

"Um… maybe, if I don't go home" she replied lightly.

"And maybe we could have dinner first…I'll pay" He continued.

"You don't need to do that" Rory replied, immediately, feeling a bit uncomfortable at the direction the conversation was heading.

"I could pick you up at your room, say about 7" he went on, staring at her intently.

Rory just nodded as if thinking it over.

Tristan was silent for a few minutes before going on

"Rory, there's…" he continued, before she interrupted him.

"I think maybe we should talk about this when we sober up" she stated half seriously, trying to focus, but her mind was getting foggy.

"Now's fine" he replied, brushing her off "I was just thinking… maybe you and I should try…" he added but was cut off again.

"Okay, where's this coming from?" Rory asked confused, not letting him finish his sentence, a strange feeling rising in her stomach at where it was headed

"Where's what" he asked not following.

"I know you like someone else" Rory blurted out, immediately berating her self.

"Someone else?" he asked confused, "What are you talking about?"

"I found the letter…in you room, I wasn't snooping it just fell out and I read it" Rory stated, "I'm so sorry, I know I shouldn't have but I couldn't help it…"

"What letter?" Tristan replied taken back, before processing, "The one in The Catcher in the Rye?"

Rory nodded in reply, "The very one... so I know there's some girl in North Carolina, who's got a boyfriend and you're desperately in love with and all that… so what are you trying to do?"

"What girl in…" He began before stopping himself and collecting his thoughts.

"I wrote that letter four years ago" he stated quietly.

"Oh" She replied confused.

"When I left to go to military school" he added.

"Oh" Rory repeated herself, processing what he had said.

"That girl was you" he finished, stepping towards her.

She thought back to her junior year, she had been going out with Dean when Tristan had left Chilton. She was the girl he had liked back then who he didn't think was good enough for him?

"Tristan I…" She began before he went on.

"See this hasn't come out of nowhere, I liked you then and I still like you now" he stated somewhat exasperated.

"Why didn't you…" she began before he rather abruptly cut her off.

"What... do something, say something, I would have, on that night on the mountain, in the taxi…if I had have thought you wanted me too, I would have been all for it" He rambled on. "And tonight I thought what the hell, I'm drunk, she's drunk we probably won't even remember this in the morning, but I was wrong, you have no idea, you'd never even consider it" he continued.

"I didn't say that" Rory replied, quietly, suddenly feeling like the walls were closing in on her.

"What if I had made a move that night…on any of the nights we went out…you would have?" Tristan exclaimed unbelievably.

Rory stood there silently unable to respond.

"I have to go" she stated suddenly turning to leave.

Tristan grabbed her arm to stop her.

"Just… let me go" she repeated, breaking free.

She pushed through the crowd, without turning back and searched for Ryan. After spotting him by the bar she raced over to him.

"We have to go" she shouted in his ear.

"Rory, are you okay?" he asked, taking in her obvious anxiety

"We just need to leave" she replied, leading him towards the door.

They walked in silence to the dorms at a record pace, until they got to Rory's dorm.

Rory let them in and immediately sat down on the bed.

Ryan settled down next to her.

"Okay what's going on?" He asked calmly.

"Nothing" she replied curtly, "I just wanted to go home"

Ryan just stared at her, not believing her for a second.

"Is this about Tristan?" he asked seriously.

"How did you know?" she replied softly.

"We had a talk earlier" Ryan informed her.

"About me?" Rory asked raising her voice a little.

"Kind of, he just asked if I thought you'd ever… and I said I didn't know, because I don't really, and that he should ask you" Ryan stated.

"So, this is all your fault" she replied half seriously, "Why did he have to say anything?" she thought out loud.

"Because he's liked you forever" Ryan responded as if she was stupid.

"He hasn't liked me forever…well I don't know… it's all so messed up" Rory replied as she tried to fight back the tears that were beginning to show at the corners of her eyes.

"So, he said something or did something you rejected him and now you're worried about your friendship?" Ryan ventured.

"No" Rory replied as she wiped her eyes.

"What, you're not worried about your friendship?" he questioned her.

"No…" She repeated herself, grabbing a tissue from her nightstand, "I didn't…reject him".

"You made out with him, he's a really bad kisser and that's why you're upset?" Ryan asked light heartedly.

Rory smiled through her tears.

"I didn't say anything… I just freaked out and left" she stated quietly, "And now I'm sitting here crying my eyes out and I don't event know why" she finished, resting her head on Ryan's shoulder.

"The guy poured his heart out, and you just left him hanging, that's harsh Gilmore" Ryan stated half seriously.

"I just didn't… know what to say" She replied deflated and exhausted the numerous drinks she had ingested still swirling around in her system.

Ryan nodded quietly. "I think maybe you should get some sleep, believe me your problems will still be their in the morning".

Rory nodded unable to muster a sentence.

Ryan got up and headed for the door as Rory curled up on her bed.


	14. Third times a charm

Rory woke up, feeling like she'd been run over by a truck.

The events of the previous night came flooding back to her. She tried to replay what had happened in her mind, but was coming up empty. It all seemed to blur together.

Tristan asking her out, finding out the letter she had found was actually about her and then the running away.

She still couldn't understand exactly what had happened. Or what was going to happen next.

She heard a soft knock on the door.

"Come in" she stated apprehensively.

"It's just me" Ryan replied, sitting down on the end of her bed and handing her a bottle of water, "I thought you could use a little hydration".

'Thanks" Rory replied sitting up.

"So, I was kind of emotional last night?" she continued, sheepishly.

"You were just upset" Ryan returned evenly.

"Have you…umm…seen him" She asked apprehensively, realising that whatever she was feeling, he must be feeling ten times worse. She had just left him there, by himself, with no explanation.

"Nope, I actually went back to look for him at the party but I couldn't find him" Ryan informed her.

"Oh" was all she could reply. She just felt kind of lost; it wasn't that she was angry at him. He hadn't done anything wrong. If anyone was to blame it was her, she couldn't be honest, she shouldn't have been snooping in the first place and she should have just given him a straight answer there and then, but now the thought of running into him made her stomach churn.

"Have you checked your phone" Ryan asked knowingly.

"I've kind of been dreading it" Rory replied honestly.

She leaned over to grab her purse of the floor and picked up her cell. A message from Tristan stood there staring back at her.

"Hey, sorry if I was an idiot last night"

Rory processed what that meant; he hadn't been an idiot; that had been her role. Did he mean he shouldn't have said anything, or that he came on too strong? He had had a lot to drink, did he even remember what had happened. Maybe he could just remember that he upset her, but didn't know why?

"What did he write" Ryan asked breaking her train of thought.

"He just apologised for the way he acted last night" she told him.

"Are you going to write back" Ryan inquired.

"Maybe latter" she returned, "I think I need a shower" she added getting up and rubbing her head.

"Okay, how about I pick you up for lunch at one, I think you need to get some air" He stated, heading for the door.

Rory nodded in reply, and trudged off to the bathroom.

* * *

After lunch with Ryan, Rory returned home to her room in a better mood. Ryan had interrogated her on their way to lunch but after they had arrived they had run into two of their friends from the dorm, and all conversation on the subject of last night had ceased. The phone rang, interrupting her thoughts.

"It's me" her mom's voice called cheerily over the phone.

"Hey" Rory replied.

"So what time should I order the pizza for" she asked.

"Actually, I was thinking about maybe staying here this weekend" Rory returned.

"Rory, my heart…you do know what this weekend it is?" Lorelai went on dramatically.

"The, my mothers being cryptic weekend" she retuned absentmindedly, thumbing through her politics folder.

"Um…the firelight festival, don't tell me those damm Skulls have brain washed you, I told you sweets, never accept a new Porsche, no matter what color it is" she rattled off.

"Don't worry I'm currently cult free" Rory replied, "I totally forgot that was this weekend" she added.

"So you're coming?" Lorelai asked, "Please, please, please…I don't think I can stand all that lovey dovey hand holding, without you there too share in the mocking with".

"Count me in" Rory relented, even though a romantic festival was the last thing she was in the mood for.

"That's my girl" Lorelai replied happily, "Did I tell you even Bootsie got himself a lady, but believe me it's not a pretty sight…"

* * *

Rory pulled up in front of Luke's deciding to stop in before she went by the house. Besides she was more likely to find her Mom there, then at home.

She noticed Kirk precariously perched on a ladder, hanging extra lights to the gazebo and waved hello, to which she received a glare in return. It was good to be back she decided.

Upon entering, she immediately spotted Lorelai at a corner table, watching the goings on in the town square.

"You made it" Lorelai greeted her.

"Did I have a choice" Rory returned half seriously, taking her seat.

"Come on, tell me this isn't the best event if the year" Lorelai retuned, shocked at her indifference, "The bonfire, the punch, the endless opportunities for comedy…it's a goldmine".

Rory laughed, "So what else is new around here", she asked.

"Not much, Kirks already fallen of the ladder twice, I'm just waiting for the hat trick" She informed her grinning wickedly.

"I'll alert the media" Rory responded out of habit.

"What about you, college girl any good stories, How's Paris" Lorelai retuned taking her attention away from the window.

"Paris is Paris, I actually haven't seen her that much lately" Rory replied thoughtfully.

It was true; ever since they had stopped sharing a room they had only seen each other occasionally. Not to mention the fact that another former Chiltonite had been taking up a lot of her time.

Just thinking about him made her a little uneasy. She had finally replied to his message, with a carefully worded, "Hey, don't worry about it. We're cool". She wasn't quite ready to face him but she didn't want him to think she was upset with him, because she wasn't.

The sound of Lorelai clapping broke her thoughts.

"Third times a charm" she informed her grinning.

* * *

After watching a movie and finishing off the pizza, Rory decided to call it an early night. She hadn't told Lorelai about Tristan yet, deciding to wait until she had thought things through.

As she went into to her room, she quickly checked her messages and saw that Tristan had sent her one earlier.

"Movie tonight" was all it said.

Rory immediately replied, informing him that she had gone home and as such obviously couldn't make it.

As she got into bed, she tried to interpret what his message had meant. There was no mention of dinner or it being a date, nothing about the other night. Was he trying to get things back to normal? And if that was so, was that what she wanted. Did he think that her taking off meant that she wanted to forget about what had happened, or didn't happen?

She berated herself for as usual over analysing every little thing. Why couldn't she just go with the flow, gone out with him just to see what might be. Or oppositely just say no; make it clear that she didn't feel about him that way.

Why was this such a big deal, this time at least they were both totally unattached, there was nothing standing in their way. But still something wasn't right, was it because they were friends and she was scared of losing that or because with Tristan it was really it, if she went out with him it wouldn't just be a date, it would be the real thing.

And now where was she. She had probably screwed things up with him as a friend and left him not knowing where she stood. She was messing with him, but she didn't know how to stop it.

She picked up the phone, and contemplated dialling. But stopped herself, this wasn't something to be dealt with over the phone. She'd just have to wait until she saw him.

And with that resolve in mind she attempted sleep.


	15. Whatever you say Cleopatra

Rory entered the campus bar apprehensively, Ryan by her side as usual. His friend's band was playing again and she had been dragged along under complete duress. To in his words "get her out of the mood" she had been in for the past few weeks.

She was cheering up slightly, the left over "fruit" punch they had drunk, from a dorm party they had had while she had been in Stars Hollow, was beginning to kick in.

Nothing much had changed since the incident at the party. She had run into Tristan a few times in the hallways and they had been overly polite to each other. Neither really acknowledging what had happened. He had been absent from the class they shared, but that could just have been typical end of semester laziness. As it was, exams were starting to loom on the horizon and there were only a couple of weeks before she would have to go into crazy study mode. Knowledge that had led her to the punch , and accepting Ryan's invitation to the bar.

She knew he would be there, but tried to act indifferent to the fact. Whatever happened happened.

"Drink" Ryan mouthed over the music. Rory nodded and followed him across the room.

She spotted Tristan with a table of their dorm mates, but quickly looked away before he spotted her.

They lined up for drinks.

"Wanna come back to my room?" a drunk guy leered at her.

"O…kay" Rory mouthed back, turning around to face the other direction.

"Hey" the guy's friend tapped her on the shoulder. She turned around, ready to let him have it.

"I know you" she said instead, recognizing the guy immediately.

"Me too, Gilmore right?" he returned.

"Uh huh Rory, you're Leigh, Stars Hollow primary, Mrs Scholls class" she replied, surprised to see a familiar face.

"That's right, how are you?" He asked politely, "Sorry about my friend by the way, he's had one to many".

"That's okay, I'm good" she returned, "You go here?" She added.

She missed Leigh's response, which was something about an away game, as Tristan caught her eye across the bar. He looked at her directly, holding his gaze, she replied with a nod of recognition before turning her attention back to her old friend.

"So it was nice to see you, we'll have to catch up later" Rory stated, as Ryan handed her her order.

"You too" he shot back, leaving with his friends.

"Picking up guys already" Ryan smirked.

"Old friend, besides I think we'll just have a quiet one tonight, I promise you no freak outs" Rory informed him sincerely.

"Hey" Tristan greeted them, siding up between them.

"Hey" they returned.

"So I just want you guys to know, I'm sorry again for anything I said or did at that party" he stated seriously.

"You didn't do anything" Rory returned, slightly uncomfortably, "We're fine" she added, directing her gaze at Tristan.

"Good" he replied, "I better get these drinks back to the guys before they get restless" he finished, heading back to their table.

"So it looks like everything's cool now" Rory stated matter of factly.

Ryan just looked at her, "Whatever you say Cleopatra".

* * *

They walked around for a while before settling in at the table Tristan and their door mates had claimed

After teasing Josh mercilessly about his pants, which had rips in the strangest places on purpose. Rory turned her attention to Tristan who was for him, being rather quiet.

"Hi" Rory mouthed across the table. In return she received a half wave.

"Having fun" she added sarcastically, stirring the ice that lay melting in her drink.

Tristan suddenly got up, "Walk" he mouthed, motioning for her to come.

She hesitated for a moment, before relenting. Leaving her drink, she motioned to Ryan where she was going and followed Tristan across the room. In fact the whole table noticed too.

They settled leaning against a nearby railing.

"So" Rory began uncomfortably. Unsure of what this was, knowing that they had to sort things out, but suddenly wishing she was back at the table.

"This is weird for you right" Tristan replied, reading her thoughts.

She nodded, looking down at her hands.

"I know but I have to say it anyway" he continued, turning to face her, "I just wanted you to know... that everything I said at the party… I meant. I don't want you to think it was because I was drunk or anything. I meant it and I still do" he rambled.

Rory made to leave, but he gently grabbed her arm and she stayed where she was.

"You never really answered me" he continued softly, "You didn't say no and I know you Rory, if it had been no, you would have told me, you just left and I'm not going to take that for an answer".

"Tristan…we're friends…" Rory began before he interrupted her.

"And what, you don't want to ruin that" He guessed, "Well the thing is we never really were friends".

"Is that what this had all been about, the movies, mini golf everything" Rory replied, unsure of how to take it.

He nodded.

Rory stared off straight ahead not knowing what to say. She glanced over to the table and noticed most of them craning to see what was going on.

"We can't do this here" she informed him, directing his attention to their prying friends.

He followed her outside to the garden and they sat down on one of the benches.

"Okay" she began after gathering her thoughts, "What do you want me to say?" she blurted out.

"How you feel" he replied simply.

"Why are you making me do this, Why can't you just leave things how they are" she returned more forcefully then she had intended.

"What making polite conversation and ignoring each other, It's out there Rory and for once you have to deal with it" he informed her as if she didn't know.

"What's that supposed to mean?" she returned

"Just that you don't deal, you run away but I'm not going to let you do that this time, because we could be something….we could have something..."he trailed off, "And I know I'm scaring you but that's life, life is choices and you're not making them".

Rory took it in, he was right and they both knew it.

"You know I've been seeing someone lately... about the depression I told you about, and I was on some anti-depressants last time and I think that mixed with the alcohol made me tell you how I really feel and I'm glad it did. Because it's the truth and it's a release, and no matter what happens I'm glad I said what I said and I can't take it back" he continue don not letting her get a word in.

"Are you okay?" She asked worried, focusing on the part about his depression.

"I'm off them now, and I'm going to be fine" he returned seriously.

"See I don't want to hurt you, I'm just going to mess you up even more" she explained.

"The truth can't hurt me, I'll deal whatever happens, but hiding it might hurt you" he replied, brushing off her concern.

"I was really upset after what you said" she stated quietly, " I mean really upset and I don't even know why…I mean if I didn't care then why would I…" she trailed off unable to finish that sentence.

"And I'm not ready for a relationship…all that comes with it, I'm just not ready to deal with all of it again or even for the first time really, and I don't want to hurt you because you mean a lot to me whatever we are" she continued.

"That's okay" he returned, "This doesn't have to be anything you don't want it to be, but you just have to be honest, I'll survive, you can't base on how you feel on how it will effect me, this is about you" he reiterated.

"I know" she stated quietly.

They sat there quietly for a minute before Rory tuned to face him. She looked at him, remembering the Rooney CD he had burnt her just because she mentioned it, the talks they had had in her room, that time on the mountain and she knew. Whatever happened, she had to at least give it a chance.

She turned to face him and slowly rested her hand on his knee, he pulled back slightly unsure of what she was doing.

"Come here" she stated simply, leaning forward, she slowly pressed her lips against his waiting for him to respond. He reciprocated and placed his hand around her waist slowly parting her lips in the process. She could smell his aftershave as she moved her hand up to his cheek as the kiss grew deeper and they stated that way until she lightly pulled away.

"So" she stated after they had broken apart.

"I wasn't expecting that, but I sure liked it" he informed her catching his breath.

"Yeah well, I had to shut you up somehow" she said lightly smiling.

"I never thought you would make the first move" he stated surprised.

"Maybe you don't know me as well as you thought you did" she returned standing up.

"You've used me and now you're going to leave?" he asked.

"I was just thinking we could use a little more privacy" she whispered in his ear pulling him up to meet her.

"Miss Gilmore, I never" he returned grabbing her by the waist, "Is this how R.As are supposed to behave?"

"Hey give me a few hours and you'll never call me Mary again" she stated, half seriously.

Tristan laughed and cradled her face in his hands. "See, this is how I was going to do it" he whispered leaning forward to meet her lips. There bodies molded into each others and she placed her hands on his stomach as the kiss grew more intense.

After parting he pushed her hair out of her eyes and leaned his forehead against hers.

"This feels right" he murmured, smiling slightly. She grinned in response sharing his sentiments. "It's only taken five years" she replied holding him closer.

"Let's get out of here" he suggested, kissing her on the forehead and taking her hand. She noticed that the garden had filled up dramatically and there display of affection had not gone unnoticed.

She nodded in agreement, and he led her to the exit, past the table their friends occupied where a few cat calls and "about times" farewelled them.


	16. Does it start with Tri and end in sta

"I hate this song" Rory murmured, from her position leaning against Tristan's chest.

"Me too" he agreed laughing.

They were sitting in the concrete amphitheatre that sat by the river that ran through campus, and was used for outdoor theatre productions.

The sounds of Hoobastank could faintly be heard from the bar they had left a good forty minutes ago, yet they had still not managed to get back to the dorms.

Instead they had settled in under the stars, in the relative privacy of the empty concrete stepped structure.

"You know we both have warm, private rooms at out disposal" Tristan stated matter of factly, "Not that I'm implying anything" he continued, "But my ass is killing".

Rory laughed, "Me too" she replied, "We'll go soon, it's just its so quiet here, no interruptions…no drunken freshman".

"Hey its fine with me…I just never knew Rory Gilmore was an exhibitionist" he joked.

"We haven't done anything that bad" Rory replied indignant, thinking for a minute and then adding "It's dark anyway, it's not like anyone can see anything".

"Just as well" Tristan stated half kidding. "It took me this long to get you; I'm not in the mood to share".

Rory smiled turning around to face him, "And how long have you been trying to get me" she whispered in his ear.

He lifted the hair away from her ear "It feels like forever" he whispered back.

Rory looked at him directly in the eye, "Was it worth the wait?" she asked seriously.

"Every bit" he replied kissing her gently. She responded eagerly before interrupting him.

"Here we go again" she joked, his response was to continue pulling her on to his lap.

"We seriously have to get back" she added, but continued on, gently sucking on his lower lip.

"Uh huh" he replied running his hands up her back.

"Seriously Ryan's going to be wondering where we got to" she informed regaining her composure.

"You're thinking about Ryan at the moment?" Tristan asked feigning annoyance.

Rory got up and brushed herself of and smiled in return, "Off course I'm just using you to get to him, is that a problem?" she informed him.

Tristan smirked "Hey as long as I'm getting some" he replied holding his hands out for her to pull him up. Rory assisted him before he continued.

"If I seriously thought that was true…" he whispered in her ear

Rory interrupted him by pulling him close to her. "I know" she replied.

"Want to head back to the bar" he asked holding her hand.

Rory nodded and they wandered back across campus.

* * *

After entering the bar they had gone there separate ways. After going to the bathroom to freshen up, Rory went searching for Ryan. 

She found him chatting to Josh in a corner.

"Sorry I disappeared on you" she apologised.

"It's okay, it's about time you two got your acts together" he replied smiling, "So what happened?" he inquired suspiciously.

"God, you don't want details, do you?" Rory replied indignantly.

"No of course not, how about a rough guide, are we talking first, second, rounding third…you were gone about an hour" Ryan added jokingly.

Rory hit him and looked around, spotting Tristan talking to some guys from their floor.

"You know I just realised that I must have lost one of my earrings" Rory stated reaching up to grab her ear

"Well what were you doing that would make an earring fall out" Ryan asked innocently.

Rory blushed at the thought of her and Tristan in the amphitheatre and reminded her self to go look for it in the daylight

"I'm sorry" Ryan apologised, "So are you two together or is this just a one off thing cos I've got this pool going and…."

Rory cut him off with a look that said if he valued their friendship at all he should stop right there.

She suddenly felt Tristan grab her waist from behind.

"Hey" Ryan greeted him, "So Rory's just been filling me in on all of the details".

"I have not" Rory replied indignantly.

"I didn't know you where one to kiss and tell Mary" Tristan played along.

"Okay pet names already…I think I'm gonna hurl" Ryan replied laughing, waving as he went off in search of another drink.

Rory turned around to face him.

"Okay so who knows?" she asked apprehensively.

"Um…" Tristan replied pausing to think, "Everyone on our floor, most of the dorm and pretty much the whole bar"

"Great" Rory replied.

"Who cares anyway, right?" he responded pulling her too him.

"I guess" Rory replied shrugging her shoulders.

"I guess?" he replied waiting for her to get defensive.

"You're right" she relented leading him to a nearby wall, "Might as well make sure everyone knows. I wouldn't want anyone to be behind on the gossip" she finished up leaning in for a very public display of affection.

* * *

Once they had arrived at Rory's door they stood silently for a moment. 

"So I guess this is goodnight" Tristan began.

Rory nodded, "This is good right?" she asked staring up at him.

"I'm good if you are" he replied stroking her arm.

"I'm definitely good" she retuned smiling, "So we're going out Saturday night?" she asked, alluding to the plans they had made on the walk over.

"I don't know if I can wait that long" he replied smirking.

"Yeah, well I have plans tomorrow so you'll just have too".

"Night" he murmured kissing her on the forehead as he left to walk down the hall.

"You know it kills me that you're just going to be a few doors down from me" he shouted over his shoulder.

"Good" Rory returned watching him as he walked the few metres to his door.

After changing into her pyjamas Rory felt a sense of calm come over her. This just felt right.

* * *

Tristan had picked her up from her room at eight and they were headed to a mystery destination in his car. 

"Okay, where are we going?" Rory asked for the fifth time.

"It's a surprise" Tristan responded, looking at the map he had printed off of the computer.

Rory sighed exasperated, but smiling at the cuteness of Tristan's behaviour. So far everything had been fine. They had gone out together many times before and things were pretty much the same.

"I seriously had like twenty people coming up to congratulate me this morning" Tristan told her changing the subject.

"Why" Rory asked puzzled.

"It seems everyone has been expecting something to happen for ages" He informed her.

"Yeah everyone except us" Rory replied laughing.

"Hey I was always up for it, I just thought you would never want it" he stated seriously.

"You never said anything?" Rory replied, "And I mean, why would I think I had a chance when you were dating half the floor?"

"I was not" Tristan replied defensively, "Name one person I've hooked up with this year" he challenged.

Rory thought about it for a minute. She had heard stories, but they mostly involved girls trying to hook up with him, she had just assumed a lot had happened and no one had told her about it.

"See" he responded as he realised she had come up empty.

"Yeah but that's just because no one is going to tell me about it. You're always surrounded by willing and eagre freshman and you're telling me you never…." Rory retorted before he cut her off.

"So I'm a flirt that's it, it never went past that, any way I was just trying to make you jealous" he replied, concentrating on the road signs.

Rory smiled at that before he went on.

"Actually I did go out with one girl, Jane from downstairs" Tristan admitted.

"Oh" Rory replied unsure of how to take that.

"A few weeks ago, we went to the movies, she's nice and all but that's when I realised…she wasn't you" he stated seriously.

"Oh my god, cheesy much" she returned laughing.

"Hey I'm serious, that's what made me realise that I couldn't get over you until either we got together or I completely ruined our friendship" he informed her.

"Well I guess I'm glad then" Rory stated, and meaning it, "But seriously "She wasn't you", I think someone's been watching a few too many Meg Ryan movies".

"Hey I'm a modern guy I can express my feelings, unlike you Lola" he retorted.

"Yeah I get it, the running reference, my my aren't you just so clever bible boy" Rory replied laughing despite herself and the joke.

"Mary, I didn't know you had a name for me, see you did care, even back then" he retuned.

"Maybe I did" Rory replied softly, thinking it over. Now that she had admitted to herself there where feelings there, maybe they had been there for a long time.

"God, don't tell me that" Tristan stated exasperated at the thought that she had felt even half of what he had back then.

"Doesn't matter, if we had gotten together back then we'd probably hate each other now" she replied, thinking of how things generally ended in her relationships.

"Maybe" he conceded. "So we're here" he informed her.

Rory looked out the window and saw they were at a drive in. Complete with 1950's style diner.

"Whoa time warp" She stated, taking in the surrounding, "This is so cool, how did you find this place?"

"Internet" he replied paying for their tickets as they pulled into a row.

"Lorelai and I always wanted to come here, but last time we checked it had closed down" Rory informed him grinning.

"Well I thought what does Rory like, movies and burgers, therefore perfect first date, the drive in" he explained.

"What are we seeing" she asked.

"It's a drive in what else are they going to play?" He asked her

"Grease" she responded immediately.

"Of course" he retorted, "So front seat or back" he asked. "Cos it depends on…how can I say this tactfully… if you want to see the movie or you want to see…"

"Tristan" Rory interrupted him "This is a drive in. My mother would be terribly disappointed in me if I didn't fulfil the real drive in experience".

"Back seat it is" he replied.

"Besides, I've seen Grease like twelve times" she answered back.

* * *

Rory finished getting ready and waited for Ryan to pick her up. It had been a week since the infamous night that she had Tristan had finally gotten their acts together.

A week in which following their date at the drive in, they had pretty much kept a distance from each other. This was at Rory's insistence, due to the fact they both had end of term papers due. And in order to get some work done they needed to take a break for a few days, mostly due to the fact that whenever they got within a foot of each other they rarely got any work done.

Maybe it had been the fact that it had been building up for so long, but now that their feelings were somewhat out there, self control had become an issue. As it was the intensity of their relationship was building up at rate that scared Rory a little.

Now however after handing in two excruciating painful essays that afternoon she had decide to give herself the night off before she went into exam study mode. As well as this, it was the last big party night of the semester and it was against the code of student conduct not to participate.

Tristan had a late study review session and was meeting them their.

"Ready to go" Ryan asked barging into her room, Rory nodded grabbed her purse.

"Where's lover boy" he asked.

"Meeting us there" Rory replied not taking his bait.

"So are you too together" he asked.

"I think so" she replied, "I haven't seen him all week, but that's what we decided, as far as I know everything's cool".

.They entered the bar and immediately spotted Tristan and the guys from their dorm at a table. They were greeted by a communal wave, and sat down to join them.

Rory smiled at Tristan from across the table and he smiled back. "Finish your essays" he asked, Rory nodded and was about to answer when Paris come running up to her.

"Rory, long time no see, come with me I need you for something" She rushed along in normal Paris fashion.

Rory got up waved goodbye to the table and followed Paris, "I'll be back" she mouthed to Tristan.

After helping Paris convince a guy that she wasn't a lesbian, despite the outfit. Rory spotted Tristan heading for the restrooms.

She went over and waited for him to come out.

"Hey" she waved to him from the wall.

"Hi" he replied back, "You waiting for me" he asked.

"Of course" Rory returned. "So how are you?" she asked casually.

"Uh…not to well I think I had a few too many shots" he replied.

"Oh, I thought you just got here" Rory asked confused.

"Class finished early" he informed her, "I'm just going to get a beer to settle my stomach" he continued.

"Yeah that will help" she murmured, slightly confused at the way he was acting.

"You want anything" he asked making to leave.

"No, I'm fine I think I'll just go look for Ryan" Rory replied.

He nodded in response and headed for the bar, leaving Rory to search for Ryan by herself.

* * *

After finally finding Ryan and beginning to get into the party spirit herself. Rory's spirits lifted slightly. Her encounter with Tristan had been odd, considering they hadn't seen each other since the weekend, but she chalked in down to the fact he had just had a few too many early and wasn't himself. It just hadn't been the reunion she had expected. Despite her sentiments to Ryan that she would live it up at the last party of the year and that she would socialise with everyone. She had secretly though that by this time of the night she and Tristan would have wandered off for a walk together, maybe to their amphitheatre of even back to the dorms.

"Did you here there's going to be fireworks" Ryan informed her slurring his speech slightly.

"Really" Rory replied, distracted. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Tristan candidly talking to Josh and a group of freshman girls.

"So what's up with you two?" Ryan asked following her gaze, "I feel like we're back to the start of the year again".

Rory shrugged her shoulders in return; unsure of what was going on. It seemed Tristan was perfectly willing and able to engage everyone they new it perfectly nice conversation, except her.

She hadn't wanted to come off too clingy. It's not like he was officially her boyfriend or anything and she wanted them both to be sociable but this was getting ridicules. He was barely acknowledging her and when he did it was as if he couldn't get away fast enough.

"I'm going to get a drink" She declared, asking Ryan of he wanted anything before heading of into the throng of people in the now overly crowded bar. She pushed her way through, finally ordering her drink and headed back to her group.

She spotted Tristan sitting at a table outside solo and went over and sat next to him.

"Long time no see" she joked, taking a sip of her drink.

"Been busy" he replied.

They sat their not saying anything, when a loud bang made Rory jump.

"There are fireworks" she stated looking over to see Tristan's reaction.

He was staring up at the sky and she followed his gaze, taking in the spectacle.

The sky was lit up in blue, green and red. Rory tried to enjoy the festivities but the silence between then was deafening.

"Pretty impressive" she stated awkwardly as they finished.

Tristan looked at her as if to say something but stopped himself.

He reached over and his hand grazed her knee but then he pulled back.

"I better go find Josh" he stated getting up and walking into the crowded bar.

Rory just looked after him, fighting back the tears that wanted to come out but biting her lip to stop them.

* * *

After wandering around lost unable to find anyone she knew, Rory ran into Tristan again who looked less then enthused to see her.

"Did you find Josh?" she asked matter of factly.

"Yep" he replied.

"That's good" she retorted.

"So on a scale of 1 to 10 how pissed are you at me" Tristan stated blankly.

Rory just looked at him, at a loss of how to respond and instead slowly turning away and walking back in the direction she came. He made no move to stop her.

* * *

She finally found Ryan in a corner happily sharing a jug with some friends.

"Wow, normal people" she stated.

"What's wrong" he asked taking in her mood.

"I have no idea" she replied, not expanding. "How are you?" She asked changing the subject.

"Actually I'm a little bit wasted…if I do say so myself" He informed her happily.

Rory mustered a smile. "Well that seems to be working for you".

"Okay so what's the matter" he asked, "Does it start with Tri and end in sta"

Rory laughed, not believing that he wouldn't let that nickname go.

"Sit down and tell me what's up" he told her patting the space on the couch next to him.

Rory sat down and rested her head on his shoulder, "Why are guys such jerks?" She asked.

"I know it's in our make-up. We can't help it. So what exactly happened?" he probed, wrapping his arm around her shoulders

"Nothing…that's the point" Rory began and then physically tightened up when the crowd parted and she saw Tristan across the room. He glanced at her before turning his attention to the two girls he was with. One of who Rory recognised as the Jane he had gone out with.

"Can we get out of here" she asked Ryan, He followed her gaze and saw Tristan with the two girls, and "Don't you want to go talk to him and straighten things out" he reasoned.

"Nope" Rory replied as Tristan wrapped Jane up in a bear hug. "Let's go" she stated, pulling him Ryan up and heading for the exit. Whatever game Tristan was playing he would have to play solo.

* * *

After Ryan had dropped her off Rory got into bed and lay there unable to sleep. What the hell was going on? She knew that she was the one who had said that she didn't want to rush things but this was ridicules. He was barely even acknowledging her presence. Had he changed his mind, was this his way of telling her that everything that had happened last week was a mistake? After all of his sentiments was he blowing her off. It didn't make any sense. He was the one who had made her face up her feelings. Was she a let down, was there someone else? Was he going through something? The whole time she had been worried about hurting him and now here she was, crying, because he had treated her like crap. And she didn't even know why. He hadn't even treated her like friend. Had she been right all along, was he a player and this was all some elaborate game to make her fall for him and then hurt her? Or was he just drunk? But if he was going to act like this when he drank it was just as bad, besides he was perfectly nice to everyone else.

These thoughts just kept running around in her head. It just didn't make sense. She was angry but she didn't know why?

She glanced over and saw her phone had a missed call on it.

Tristan's name flashed on it. She contemplated answering but stopped herself.

Why did he want to talk to her now, when he had ignored her all night?

And the thing that hurt the most was that he had known she was pissed at him, he was purposely trying to push her away and yet he didn't care.

All she knew was that if this is how he was going to act after everything that had happened he wasn't worth the trouble. And the though that after everything, she had probably lost him as a friend, hurt even more.

Her anger gave way to thoughts that maybe it was something she had done. Was it her insistence that she didn't want a real relationship, had she not made it clear how she felt? But she felt she had, he had to know that for her to kiss him, for her to kiss anybody it was a big deal. And he knew how things had ended with Jess, how much trouble she had opening up, trusting people and now this.

After tossing and turning for a few minutes she finally decided to message him back, not able to gather the courage to speak to him.

"So what's going on, I know I'm pissed at you but I'm not sure why, and I don't think it's just because you were drunk", she wrote.

There, she would give him a chance to explain.

Her phone flashed, telling her he had replied.

"See this is what I was worried about, now things are weird and you're upset and that's the last thing I wanted"

What did that mean? Of course she was upset! And what did he mean, that's what he was worried about. He was the one who had pushed things, made her feel and now what; he was upset that he had made things weird by practically ignoring her. If this was how things were he wasn't worth her tears or even her friendship.

And with that she turned off her phone and attempted sleep.

Whatever she and Tristan had had, as friends or maybe for a brief period of time more was over.


	17. Matters of the boy

Somehow, Rory managed to avoid Tristan for the rest of the week. Quite a feat considering the proximity of their living arrangements. She couldn't help but think that he was doing the same.

It was actually easier then she thought given everybody was pretty much locked in their rooms, cramming in a semesters worth of coursework, in order to at the very least pass their finals.

A feat which Rory could concentrate on better once she put all Tristan related thoughts out of her mind, concluding that she would deal with it after finals.

All she knew was that she wasn't going to let some guy, distract her from what was really important.

* * *

Rory dropped her bag on the floor and let out a sigh of relief. She had done it. She had finished all her finals and she felt confidant that although they may not be her best work ever, her result shouldn't hurt her GPA or her chances of grad school.

And with that over she decided to start packing her car. Back to Stars Hollow and away from all the drama of the past few weeks. Ryan had left earlier that day, but not before making her promise to attend his birthday party in Boston the following month.

As Rory lugged an impossibly heavy box of books down the hall, she contemplated knocking at Tristan's door but quickly thought better of it. He was the one who would have to make the first move, she thought, he was the one who had made things weird.

As she wandered back for a second load it occurred to her that he had made the first move, in fact he had made most of the moves. She tried to imagine what it had taken for him to confront her not once, but twice about his feelings when she had majorly blown him off the first time.

She decided that maybe she should make the effort, or at least give him a piece of her mind.

Taking a deep breath she brought her hand up to knock on his door. As she made contact she realised it was already open.

Making her way inside she was confronted by a spotless room. Any evidence of someone living there had been removed.

So he had left, she thought. Well that made things clear, he wasn't worth it.

She noticed his keys lying on the desk and despite her attempt not to, quickly glanced around for a note of some sort but come up empty.

"Screw him" she muttered under her breath, and I don't mean literally, she thought.

They were done. And although he would probably only be thirty minutes away in Hartford, it might as well be a continent as far as she was concerned. And to think she had been ready to forgive him.

* * *

"Mom" Rory yelled as she let herself in.

"In here" she heard her Lorelai's voice reply.

Rory entered the kitchen to find a very odd sight.

"You're cooking?" she asked, surprised at the sight of Lorelai decked out in her Hello Kitty apron, mixing bowl in hand.

"It's packet" she replied concentrating, "And it's not working" she added showing Rory the mixture which had a consistency akin to scrambled eggs.

"Gross" Rory replied, laughing.

"That's what I get for trying to make a 'Welcome Home Rory' cake" Lorelai replied perturbed.

"Thanks for trying" Rory returned, unconvincingly.

"Don't worry Sookie sent a back up" she sighed giving up and dumping the mixture in the bin.

"Oh… triple chocolate mouse cake" Rory exclaimed finding the good cake sitting on a bench.

"So was mine" Lorelai huffed.

"All that matters, is that you tried" Rory stated condescendingly.

Lorelai pouted, before grabbing a fork and joining her at the cake.

"Dig in" she exclaimed.

* * *

Rory glanced at the clock and realised it was almost three in the morning.

"Don't you have to work tomorrow" she asked Lorelai, who was cuddled up at the other end of the sofa.

"Ehh, I'll go in late" she replied.

That had become engrossed in an unexpected marathon of perhaps the most addictive, crappy reality show ever, in which a bunch of teenagers in California pretended they weren't acting. It also included the development of the most addictive love triangle since the third season of Dawson's Creek.

They continued watching as the overly tan Stephen finally made a choice between bad girl Kristin and girl next door LC.

"I can't wait till next season" Lorelai's exclaimed in her best Valley girl voice.

"I know it's like… total torture" Rory returned twirling her hair.

"Speaking of love triangles…how's Ryan…and Tristan for that matter" Lorelai baited, changing the subject as she turned off the T.V.

"I don't know what you mean?" Rory returned, pretending to yawn.

"You're not getting out of it that easy" Lorelai informed her, "Ever since you've been home there has been a suspicious lack of talk about a certain former Chiltonite, who until a month ago you spoke of quite regularly…spill".

Rory sighed not wanting to get into it.

"Come on, you know you'll tell me eventually so just get it over with" she stated.

"Okay so here's what happened…" Rory began feeling better finally being able to get it off her chest.

"… So that's it" she finished. Relating all that had gone down at Yale, "It's over".

Lorelai took it all in for a moment before replying.

"Ahh, that's not over" she informed her daughter confidently.

"What do you mean?" Rory returned, confused.

"Rory, my heart, I know that you may not be as experienced as some in matters of the boy, but I thought with all the Jess and Dean drama you might have gotten a clue. A guy doesn't just pour his heart out to you twice, three times if you count the letter and then suddenly decide he doesn't like you" Lorelai's stated.

"But maybe he changed his mind, or it was about the chase or…" she replied.

Lorelai shook her head.

"And I did say that I wasn't ready for anything serious so maybe he moved on" Rory ventured.

"Honey, when a guy cares about you as much as he does, he takes what he can get, believe me" she informed her daughter sincerely.

"Then what happened?" Rory asked exasperated.

"Okay here's my take without actually knowing every single detail. You two got together, on his side feelings were clear, yours slightly cloudier, at least in their expression to him. You don't see each other for a week and when you finally do, you play it cool, not wanting to be too clingy. He takes this as a rejection; maybe you've changed your mind, whatever. He retaliates by backing off slightly and so on. By the end of the night things haven't gone the way either of you had planned, and therefore it's awkward. He calls you trying to patch up, you don't answer and there you have it" Lorelai finished.

"But what about the message, that sounded like the ultimate blow off to me"

"Maybe" Lorelai replied, unsure.

"All I know is that I didn't want to lose a friend or get hurt, and in the end both happened" Rory exclaimed contemplating the situation, "But maybe that's for the best, to end things now before we get to involved, because I'd rather it be me then him… because I can take it but I'm not sure he could"

"Are you sure he's not already" Lorelai ventured, "Call him".

Rory retuned immediately "Nope, I still think it's up to him, besides maybe its better this way, my life's simple, no complications".

"Okay, but simple isn't always better" Lorelai's finished getting up and making her way too bed.

"Night" She finished kissing her daughter on the forehead.

Rory sighed and lay down on the couch: things suddenly less simple then she had made them out to be.

Feedback appreciated. I'm at an impasse.


	18. The ball was in his court

Rory handed her coat to the maid as she entered Ryan's house. The place was packed and beautifully decorated. She quickly spotted Ryan holding court in the corner and made her way over.

"Happy birthday" she exclaimed giving him a friendly hug.

"You made it" he replied, smiling, "Okay, everyone this is Rory, Rory everyone"

Rory waved to Ryan's friends as they introduced themselves.

After making some polite conversation she quietly excused herself to get a drink and place her present on the table in the corner. She had managed to score Ryan a rare Rolling Stones LP that she knew he would love. His taste in music was pretty much restricted to anything before 1980.

She glanced around the room and spotted a few familiar faces from school. And despite her best attempts she was curious to see if a certain tall blond haired boy was present, not that she was talking to him.

"And just who are you looking for?" Ryan's voice startled her as he snuck up behind her.

"No one" she returned, ignoring his insinuation.

"He's not here" he retuned, not buying her nonchalance for one minute.

"Is he um…coming?" she asked evenly.

"Not sure" Ryan replied, " I spoke to him a few weeks ago and he said he was, but then I got a message a few days ago saying he was doing something for his birthday".

"His birthdays not for a month?" she returned confused.

"I know, and he knew about my party for ages so… who knows?" Ryan answered.

"Weird" Rory thought out loud.

"Dance?" Ryan asked, changing the subject.

Rory recognised a song by The Format and agreed; obviously Ryan hadn't been in charge of the music.

As if reading he mind, "My sister is playing DJ" He informed her as they made their way to the dance floor.

"She's good" she answered getting in the spirit of things.

* * *

After dancing for what seemed like ages and making the rounds of her dorm mates who had made the trip, Rory worked her way outside to get some fresh air.

As she settled down on a step, she pulled out her phone and looked to see if there had been any calls or messages. Despite her best efforts she found herself doing that all too often. And ever since she had last seen him, she had really expected him to call, but he hadn't, not so much as a hello.

Rory stared at her phone willing herself not to call him, but maybe it was the setting, or the champagne but she felt that she had to know why. What the hell was the deal between them?

She felt the butterflies rise in her stomach as she scrolled down the list to his name, right after Tony's Pizza. Before she could change her mind she dialled.

The phone rang for what seemed like an eternity. Before a beep and then;

"Hi, you've reached Tristan's mobile, leave a message if you're hot"

Rory paused for a second, before hanging up.

She wasn't going to leave this on a voicemail.

Immediately she regretted calling, just the sound of his voice had filled her with dread.

Oh well the damage was done. He would see that he had a missed call from her and if he cared, he would reply. The ball was in his court. And with that thought she rejoined the party.

* * *

When it got to around three people began to head home. Ryan had convinced her earlier not to drive all the way home, so she was staying in one of the guest rooms.

"Hey I'll show you your room" he stated as the last of the local guests left.

They made their way up the staircase to a nice double, with a view of the pool.

"You got the good room, Dave's passed out on the couch" Ryan informed her in reference to their fellow floor mate.

"So did you have fun?" he asked as Rory sat on the bed and took of the heels that had been killing her all night.

"Yeah, it was good, your parents are a blast although I think your Dad's worse of than you" she returned smiling at the memory of Ryan's Dad starting his own personal conga line.

"Don't remind me" Ryan laughed.

"Hey I didn't get a chance to meet Michelle" Rory pondered, in relation to his ex.

"She didn't make it, something about a last minute trip to Paris" Ryan returned quietly, "Sounds to me like she left the country to avoid my birthday party, that's flattering".

"I'm sure it's not like that, maybe she had a sudden craving for croissants, or um…smelly French soccer players" Rory theorised.

"Maybe" he relented, "No sign of Trista either" he added.

"I know…I called his cell too" she informed him.

"And?" Ryan prompted.

"He didn't answer, and he hasn't called me back" she stated, trying to hide her disappointment.

"He's not worth it" Ryan stated wrapping his arm around his friend. "Any one who would just blow you off like that…they're so last semester" he added lightening the mood.

"I don't know but maybe he was… and I blew my chance" she retuned quietly.

* * *

Another month passed by and Rory realised that it was time to start thinking about the new semester again. It felt like the year had flown by and it had. It was just this time last year that she had gone to the Ash concert. And nothing much had changed. She was a year older, but not really wiser. She was one year closer to her future and that scared her more then she could admit, although grad school could delay the real word for a few more years.

It was weird how so little could change in a year. Aside from the Tristan thing, which she had decided wasn't really anything, her life was pretty much in the same place it had been last year.

She had yet to hear from him and wasn't expecting too. There had been a mysterious missed call at four o'clock in the morning on her mobile but no number had show up.

And despite her better judgement she had decided to do the bigger thing and send him a short birthday message, the simple salutation of "happy birthday". To which after a few days she had received the confusing reply of "Who is this?" implying that he had probably deleted her number from his phone. She had replied "Rory" and gotten no response.

So there that was the extent to which her life had changed in the boy department. She was pretty much as estranged from Tristan as she had ever been.

But aside from that her life was good. She was, meeting Ryan up in Boston for lunch next week, and Lane had scored free tickets to a concert in New York. She was fine; she didn't need him and his so called friendship. Her life was good she concluded.

And the fact that she was all too acutely aware that she had twenty three days until classes started and the unavoidable reality of seeing him was of no consequence. Or at least that's what she told herself.


	19. Not even close

"Okay, I can't believe that was my last class ever" Rory exclaimed to Ryan as they exited their late afternoon lecture.

"For you, some of us still have a year to go" he replied, not all that unhappily, relieved that he could delay entry into the real world.

"Well that's what happens when you change majors four times" she retorted, "and take a semester off to go to the Greek Islands" she added.

"Hey, I was on student exchange" Ryan shot back sheepishly, knowing fully well that he had spent the entire time impressing European girls with his Ouzo drinking skills.

Rory parted ways with Ryan and promised to meet up with him at an end of semester bash that night. As she walked back to the dorm she thought about what lay ahead. She had finished, well not really, exams were in a few weeks and she still had a killer essay for her Chaucer class to complete, but after that she was free.

For a whole two months that is, until she started her dream job. She had forgone grad school as somehow, she had managed to score one of the prestigious graduate positions with a Hartford and New York based media conglomerate. It had newspaper, magazine and television interests and as a graduate she would get a chance to rotate through the divisions for her first year. It was ideal, as she still wasn't sure exactly what avenue she was going to take and the experience she would gain would be invaluable. And not only would they; barring any major disaster, take her on at the end of the year, she actually got paid pretty well, which only added to its appeal. She had actually known about the job for months as much of the graduate process occurred early on in the year. And as a result she had been able to coast though her last the semester with a plan in place and her future clearly lay out

Not that she had really coasted, she was after all her, but it had been fun. A time to relax and appreciate her friends and the wonderful opportunity college had been.

Not that it had been all great, there was one part of her life she had abandoned, or at least put on the back burner. It wasn't really her fault, she had been busy, the first half of the year had been all about the future, organising her resume, applying, interviewing and still keeping up with her classes, and she had excuses. As for the second half of the year there was no point starting anything now, she was leaving soon, back to Stars Hollow for the summer and then onto her job in Hartford, it would just be a waste of time.

Of course, there was maybe another reason for what as Lorelai had deemed it her "dating drought" or "Sister Lorelai Gilmore" period. But she hadn't spoken to him since that night, she had seen him across the room at a few parties but he had taken careful pains to avoid her, she had then heard that he had taken some time off, something involving backpacking around Europe, but she had since been informed, by Ryan, that he was back in town, not in school, but around. Perfectly within "cell phone range" as he liked to point out. Not that she cared. Or so she insisted to Ryan many a time when he pressed on the issue both in his emails when he was half a world away and following his return to the States. He had finally gotten the message and dropped the topic.

She really rarely even thought about him because as she liked to tell herself time and time again they didn't even date. But they had been friends and Rory wasn't used to losing people she cared about, and she had cared about him in some way. You can't hang out with someone for a year and not care when they suddenly decide to stop speaking to you all together with no explanation. She knew she should just ask him, but she was afraid of the answer, and in the end the thing was, that that wasn't Rory. She didn't confront people. She ran away, she always had. Because it was easier and because it seemed that every time she did open up, the person she cared about left. They got married or went across the country or even across the world. And yet she stayed, right where she always had been. Happy and with everything in the world looking up, but still somehow empty.

As she got back to her room she paused for a second, pretending to look at the noticeboard, as two girls talking in the hall next to her doorway mentioned a familiar name;

"Tristan Dugrey's coming, I thought he dropped out?" the red head from her sociology class exclaimed.

"He's just taking time off, he still comes to almost every party on campus" her friend replied.

"Whatever, the guy is totally smoking hot and such a bad boy I heard that he slept his way through half of Western Europe" the red head informed her smirking.

"Yeah right, that's just a rumour, but I do know he hooked up with Casey Jones last week, the lucky thing" the other girl reported, "He totally didn't call her though, talk about love' em and leave' em, the boy is trouble" she added.

"Like you wouldn't" the first girl shot back.

"Yeah, but I like trouble, it matches by complexion" the other girl finished as the campus bells rang and the two girls headed down the hall realising they were late for class.

Rory let herself into her room, letting that bit of gossip sink it. She sometime hated that it was almost impossible to avoid people entirely. Especially someone like Tristan, there was always some bit of news floating around, or sone bit of gossip that would find its way back to her. Never on purpose, but it was always there.

So he was going tonight. That was information that shouldn't have surprised her but still filled her with a sense of unease. It had been this exact party last year that Tristan had pulled his great Houdini act. At least this year she was pretty sure the only fireworks that would happen would be the pretty ones in the sky, not that the kind that messed with your heart.

* * *

She walked in late, not that it was her fault. Her mom had called just before she was meant to leave and had insisted on telling her how she had found Babette's cat. Who as it turned out, had not been cat-napped as Babette had assumed, but was instead hiding under Andrew's house. And the fact that Lorelai had found her was all due to the skills she had picked up after watching a Veronica Mars marathon. Which in turn led to Lorelai informing/telling her that she would not me allowed back into the house for summer break until she had watched the entire first season and written down a detailed episode by episode summary of who she had thought the murder was, so they could compare notes.

Rory laughed to herself, just thinking about the conversation and Lorelai's impassioned defence when mocked as to the fact she had been watching UPN. She spotted Ryan and went up to greet him.

He enveloped her in a bear hug, "I'm going to miss you Ror Ror" he exclaimed obviously intoxicated.

"Ror Ror? Do I look like a Psi Beta Bimbo to you" she replied smiling.

"Well, put some highlights in, maybe a Mystic tan…" he started before Rory affectionately punched him in the shoulder.

"I am going to miss you though" he added.

"Me too" she replied, suddenly getting a bit emotional, "Hey I'm not going anywhere yet, maybe I'll fail and we can retake Smith's Poly-Sci together" she joked, alluding to Ryan's own failure of the subject due to extreme slacking off.

"Hey, just a heads up, Tristan is…" he began, before she cut him off.

"I heard" she informed him, before changing the subject "So where's the nearest punch bowl, and please tell me it's 80 proof"

"Rory?" Ryan shot back, surprised at her eagerness to drink.

"Hey, last college party ever, Ry Ry, time to have a little fun" she informed him leading the way to the nearest bar.

* * *

After a few hours Rory was into the party spirit. She had spotted Tristan a few times. She had to admit he looked good, he always did. But he had been careful not to run into her. Every time she was talking to any of their mutual friends he was careful not to approach them. And when she did return to a conversation it seemed like he had just slipped away moments earlier.

She didn't care; she was having too much fun. The place was packed, but that was the point of college parties, everyone talked to everyone, as best they could that is given the volume of the music.

In need of fresh air she made her way outside. Luckily enough, the annual end of classes fireworks put on by the Student Council had just started and she stood in awe. She loved fireworks, there was something magical about them but it made her sad, this was it she thought, college was finishing.

"Rory" a kind voice interrupted her thoughts as the display come to a finish.

"Murray" she stated, recognising one of her dorm mates from junior year.

"Long time no see" she stated smiling, happy to see they guy, he'd always been a friendly face.

"I know, I was overseas, backpacking with a couple of buddies, you know Tristan and James right" he told her.

"Oh yeah, I heard about that, how was it?" Rory returned automatically. Murray went on to talk about Amsterdam and how it had in fact been a let down. She only half listened. Once again there was Tristan popping up in conversation, wasn't there anything else anybody could talk about? It was as if Yale was People magazine and he was Paris Hilton.

"So have you seen Tristan around, I promised I'd say goodbye before I left" he asked, looking at his watch.

"Um…I saw him inside before, he doesn't really talk to me anymore" she replied awkwardly.

"Doesn't he?" Murray replied confused, "I guess he still thinks things are weird between you two" he added, thinking about it.

"Only because he made them that way" Rory replied lightly.

"I guess he thinks you hate him" Murray stated.

"Why would you think that?" Rory asked evenly, "Has he been bad mouthing me or something"

"No, it's just he thinks you…he doesn't, I don't know" Murray informed her, realising that perhaps he's said something he shouldn't have, "Don't tell him I said anything".

"Why would I…" she began before stopping, "I don't hate him, he's a nice guy" she said softly, "He just…I don't know…" she trailed off.

Murray smiled, "He really is a nice guy, just sometimes he doesn't act like it" he finished, before heading away, not sure what to say.

Rory went to the bathroom to gather her thoughts. Okay that was strange, she thought, so he thinks I hate him and he won't even face up to me. What does he think I'm going to say? She had thought a lot of things about Tristan, but being scared of her wasn't one of them.

She headed back inside looking for Ryan who she found talking to some of their friends from class.

"Where did you wander off too" he yelled in ear and handed her a drink.

"Just talking to Murray" she replied, glancing around the room.

"You okay" Ryan asked concerned.

"I'm getting a bit tired, can we leave soon" she asked, her head starting to hurt from the punch and her somewhat confusing chat a few minutes earlier.

Ryan nodded and told her meet him outside in second, he wanted to say goodbye to some of his "lady" friends, as he liked to call them.

As Rory headed towards the exit a voice stopped her.

"Can I talk to you for a second?" Tristan stated calmly coming up behind her.

"I guess" Rory replied, swallowing her surprise and following him into a quiet corner, wishing that she had left a few minutes earlier.

They stood there in silence until Rory feigned small talk,

"Haven't seen you in ages, how are you?" she stated as normally as possible.

"Fine" he replied rather coldly.

Another uncomfortable silence followed.

"So what did you want to talk about?" Rory asked frustrated.

"I just wanted to say I'm sorry" he stated, not looking her in the eye.

Rory didn't reply. Sorry for what, she wanted to say; pretending you were my friend, messing with my head, blowing me off and not talking to me for a year. But what good would any of that do. And that's when she realised; there was nothing that he could say that would make things normal between them. What was normal anyway, they weren't really friends, they never had been, it had been messed up from the beginning and nothing could change that. So instead all that came out was.

"I…don't care" she said, "I really don't want to talk about this" she added making to leave.

"No, Look just hear me out" he said stopping her, "I know you don't care, you probably never did, but I want you to know I never meant to hurt you, I just…I was messed up and I'm a different person now and I thought you should know that".

"Thankyou, I guess" she returned before adding "But you don't have to apologise, it doesn't matter, I'm fine, don't worry about it, it's not like it was anything anyway" she rattled on, not sure of what to say, and not looking him in the eye

"I guess that's that then" Tristan finished coldly and walked off, leaving her standing by herself.

Rory stood there for a second, breathing slowly. What the hell was that? She thought.

She headed off in the other direction and found Ryan waiting by the exit.

"What happened to you?" he asked.

"Tristan apologised" she stated evenly.

"Really what did he say?" he asked curiously.

'"I really don't want to talk about it" she replied definitively and Ryan took the hint.

"So I take it you two aren't friends again" he added as they made there way back to the dorms.

"Not even close" she replied sadly.


	20. Of all the places

Rory picked up the mail from the table and sat down on the couch taking her shoes off in the process. It was amazing how quickly you got used to wearing grown up clothes everyday, she thought to herself. It was kind of like Chilton, a uniform; you didn't have to think to hard. Sure sometimes you wore a cute wrap dress or a great new blazer but it was also perfectly fine to wear a crisp white shirt, black a-line skirt and black flats, which were her godsend when running around all day. Looked great and almost as comfortable as slippers if you wore them in the right way.

For her it was great to live at home again. Her first rotation had been with a paper in New York, she had shared an apartment with a girl named Odette who Ryan knew from Yale, it was a pretty great set up. The girl's parents had brought her a great two bedroom as a graduation gift and Rory had rented a room to supplement her clothes allowance, worked out well all around. It was all she had really needed; the first 6 months of full time work had been exhausting, exhilarating but exhausting. She had spent all her time either working or sleeping. She did go out occasionally, especially when Lorelai come for the weekend or with the other graduates with the program after work but it had all been kind of a blur.

Now she was back in Stars Hollow, her second placement was at a local TV station in Hartford and so far it had been going smoothly. Perhaps because, to say the least the place was slightly slower paced then the newspaper biz in NYC and partly because she was used to the nine to five life now. She'd only been there a few weeks but she'd already settled into a routine. As a graduate her job involved a lot of administrative work, which Rory didn't mind at least in the short term and was learning so much in the process.

Some people say the transition from college to the real world is the most stressful time of your life, but for Rory it felt right. Not that she didn't miss Yale, she did, but that part of her life was behind her now. The minute she had walked across that stage at graduation she had felt a sense of finalisation, ready to move on and finally grow up.

Although this idea felt strange now considering she had just moved back to her childhood home and was opening a letter with a Chilton crest on it.

"You are formally invited to the Class of …"

The letter began; Rory felt a strange feeling in her stomach as she scanned the page. A five year class reunion she processed, to be held in two weeks time.

* * *

"I'm so old" Rory stated dramatically as she sat down at the kitchen table.

"Hey if you're old, then that makes me…," Lorelai replied pulling the tater tots out of the oven and then pausing.

"Can't think of a reference" Rory supplied

"Well you know what they say happens as you get older" she said, grabbing the marshmallows from the cupboard.

"What?" Rory replied playing along.

"I don't remember…wait, who are you, where am I"

"You are hilarious, have I ever told you that" heading into the lounge

"Not nearly enough, and you have been gone to the big bad city, you've certainly got some catch up ego boosting ahead of you" Lorelais finished as she sat down next to her. "So, 5 year reunion got you freaked" she added.

"Has it ever" Rory replied, opening up the takeaway Chinese, which they had ordered to accompany there tator tots after Lorelai had managed to burn the chicken nuggets.

"I remember my ten year reunion like it was yesterday…" Lorelai' began.

"Wait but you didn't finish" Rory interrupted.

"Yeah but I still got invited…along with Jason Reid who got kicked out his second semester freshman year for smoking dope behind the bleachers, esteemed company let me tell you…"

"How have I not heard this story before" Rory wondered aloud

"Because I blocked it out from my memory, yours too, I am just that powerful" she stated seriously. "So anyway I turn up, you were at Sookies where she was filling you up with quadruple choc fudge brownies, I was looking fabulous, and you see I thought a reunion what else to wear…

"You didn't"

" I did, tartan skirt the whole deal, my actual uniform by the way it still fit, that was the one highlight…and no one thought it was the even a little bit funny, they were too busy comparing their rocks the size of mars and talking about how the vineyard was just too typical for an engagement party in June… and then John Renyolds-Court propositioned me with his hotel key and I ended up hiding in the bathroom because Bunny Reynolds- Court was blocking the exit having had heard about Johnny Boys little offer and was looking for a fight. So I crawled out the window ran to my car and pretended the whole night never happened."

"Good story but now I really don't want to go to my reunion"

"Why not, you're a success, my highflying little reporter, go rub it in the faces of those college drop outs who are washing cars for a living" Lorelai replied triumphantly.

"It's Chilton, the drop outs just go to work at Uncle McRich's brokerage firm"

"Good point, so are you going to go or not?" she asked seriously

"I'll see, it'd be nice to see some of my teachers again" Rory pondered

Lorelai shot her long held look that meant that statement classified Rory in the same category as the nerdy kid from ….

"I might go, but there's just no one there I'm really desperate to see"

"That's fine, as long as you don't not go because your desperate not to see someone, if that makes sense" Lorelai finished starting the movie.

* * *

As she tried to sleep that night, she though back to the last time she had seen Tristan,

It hadn't been at that last college party as Ryan and her Mom thought. It had actually been a few months ago. She struggled to remember the details as it had been close to four in the morning, in a tiny New York bar that she had just happened to stumble into him.

She had been out with Odette and some of her friends who had came down from Yale for the weekend to celebrate Odette's birthday, it was after a long night that Odette's bimbo like friend Kiki had dragged them all to meet up with her boyfriend who had wound up at a bar across town. It had turned out that Kiki's boyfriend was Tristan's friend Murray, as soon as Rory went up to say hi to him, she heard a voice to her left:

"Gilmore" Tristan stated joining the group as if he wasn't surprised in the least to see her at 4 in the morning in a New York bar called "Rick's Place"

"Of all the places, in all the world…" he continued on, misquoting

"Clever "she shot back.

She ignored him as she turned back to Murray and some of his other friends she knew from school, as they informed her that they had been on a bar crawl to celebrate the end of exams.

"So Rory, don't see you around New Haven anymore" Murray's friend John asked nicely.

"I graduated, no time for slackers like you guys" she retorted.

"She's moved on" Tristan stated coolly, "come for a walk with me" he added, gesturing to the little courtyard outside

"I'm fine thanks" she replied politely, not ready for whatever drunken thought he had to tell her, she realised these were the only time they seemed to see each other, when both were drunk and they happened to be in the same place even though neither of them had intended it

"No really, you'll like what I have to say" he continued.

She relenting, realising that it was inevitable and followed him outside.

"So um.. Rory I miss hanging out with you" he stated

"Okay, well when you stop talking to someone and just ignore then, never call, never write that's what happens they stop hanging out with you" Rory shot back, perhaps more harshly then she meant to, but she was tired and drunk and not in the mood for dragging up the past.

"It was weird, don't, you think it was weird, we couldn't just hang out after…" he began, before Rory cut him off.

"What was so weird, all we did is make out a few times, it wasn't a big deal, but I thought we were friends and that was important to me, and you just stopped talking to me and blew me off…" she began before stopping herself, she had been here before she realised and the outcome never changed.

"It wasn't just…you know I liked making out with you but, I was a different person back then and now I've changed…" he trailed off, perhaps realising the same thing.

Rory was barely paying attention to him, she was sick of going around in circles, they weren't going to be friends again, they weren't going to be anything.

"I better get going"

Of course" he shot back, "Call me sometime, we'll hang out" he stated meekly as she left.

Rory waved him off, both of them knowing she never would

She came back to reality, that feeling in her stomach whenever she thought about Tristan appearing. Normally she thought she had finally grown up, on her way to becoming a reporter but whenever she was around Tristan she never actually said what she wanted to say, to ask him flat out what happened, to say yes she wanted to be friends but she just couldn't get over the fact he hurt her, that she missed what they had, but was too stubborn to admit that to him. Instead they both acted like teenagers and she was sick of it.

As for the reunion she doubted he would go and, she would like to see what her class was up too, that and the urgent call she had received from Paris that afternoon insisting she attend with her meant that in two weeks she was on her way back to Chilton

To be continued…


	21. What happened between us?

**FRONT OF CHILTON **

Rory walked into the courtyard, a small smile forming on her face. Scenes from long ago flashing through her mind. Back in the days when, although she hadn't realized it fully at the time. She had had two guys fighting over her, two really great guys.

She stood at the entrance, no one else was around. Probably because the reunion had already been going for an hour and a half. She realized she's taken that fashionably late thing a little too far.

She was about to finally go in before realizing she'd left her cell phone in the car She turned to go get it when she heard a voice behind her.

"Running away as usual Mary" he stated softly…

**6 hours earlier**

TRISTAN'S APARTEMENT

Tristan sat in his new apartment flipping the invitation over in his hand, as if he looked hard enough the answer would reveal itself.

If his parents had just forwarded his mail one say later he never would have seen it in time, never had to see it and immediately feel that familiar pang in his stomach whenever he thought about her.

What that feeling meant he wasn't sure, regret, was defiantly part of it but there were some other feelings mixed up in there that he couldn't articulate.

Those two little words "Chilton Reunion" brought back over 5 years of memories that he had tried, to the best of his ability to forget.

**Flashback**

He shouldn't have gone out that night, like Rory he too should have been studying but he couldn't concentrate. All he kept thinking about was the other night and what had happened and what that meant.

He'd let the guys drag him out to the bar and had kept up with the drinking for a while, but had stopped when things started to get blurry. He didn't need that anymore he thought, things were changing, and he was changing.

Ryan had turned up about half past 11, already drunk. He too, seemed to have something on his mind but not in a good way.

"So you and Rory huh" Ryan slurred, while putting his empty shot glass on the bar.

"Uh huh" he replied, not revealing much in his voice. Things were still pretty new he thought to himself, really they'd only had the one real date, excluding that first night at the bar.

"Well I'm glad" he stated, although from where Tristan was standing he really didn't look it.

"Really" Tristan smirked back, although partially regretting it.

"Well... Ryan began before stopping himself; "Drink?" has asked changing the subject and turning toward the bar again.

"No, I'm fine, so what were you going to say?" he asked slightly more forcefully then he had meant to

"Don't hurt her" he stated, looking Tristan directly in the eye.

"I..." Tristan began before being cut off,

"She deserves more then that, she deserves someone who will treat her like…" he began before Tristan cut him off.

"Like you would" he filled in, getting the picture.

Ryan wasn't going to remember this is the morning, Tristan thought. And maybe it was better that way. He'd always suspected how Ryan felt about her; it was like he recognized himself in the guy.

He felt like getting angry but for some reason he couldn't, because he knew Ryan was right.

"You know, huh" Ryan said, smiling in spite of himself, "It's just I know she doesn't feel that way about me, so I wouldn't push it or anything, but the thing is I just want her to be happy, no matter who she's with even if it's not me" he finished.

**End of flashback **

Tristan stood up and went to the box marked, "College stuff". He pulled out the box of letters. Letters he had tried not to write and had never sent. Looking at them now they seemed so sappy.

He opened the first one, it began _-"I keep having these dreams where I know exactly what the right words are. And you tell me …that you forgive me…"_ He carefully folded it back up and placed it in its envelope, not needing to read the rest.

He picked up the next one - _"If no one in your life is the world to you, then you're free. It's when they are the world and you lose them, then you're screwed"_

They were all the same he remembered, or at least all along the same lines. All the feelings he'd had back then crammed into one little box, there were over 20 letters, all carefully folded in blue envelopes and all with the same four letters on the front.

**Flashback **

"So on a scale of 1 to 10 how pissed are you at me" He shot out, she walked away slowly. The look she gave him almost killed him.

He was such an asshole he thought to himself. Here was Rory coming to him, openly making the effort to connect and he was doing everything he could to push her away. The standard brush off routine he'd done a million times before and knew by heart.

And the worst thing was he knew he was the one who had pushed it to begin in the first place, the idea of being with her had became overwhelming, he hadn't stopped to think of what would happen afterwards.

And this stupid game, where he acted like they barely knew each other was the only way he could do it, because he couldn't even bring himself to come right out and say it, that he didn't want to be with her. Because the truth was he did, he wanted to be with her more then anything in the world but it wouldn't work. He couldn't make her happy, not now, not like this. Where he had been pining for her for years and she was just starting to come around.

She'd even admitted that she wasn't ready for a real relationship. And even though she wouldn't mean too, the back and forth that had already started would screw him up, more then he already was.

He would hurt her, he knew it and in the end that wasn't worth it. And hurting her, really hurting her, would be more then he could stand.

He saw her go over to Ryan sitting on the couch in the corner and rest her head on his shoulder. Ryan was a better guy then he ever was, he actually cared more about how Rory felt then his own feelings. And Tristan had never been that person. He'd gone after her now even when she didn't want him too. And this wasn't new, even in high school even when she'd had a boyfriend, even when she'd been happy, he'd only thought about himself and what he wanted.

For once he wasn't going to do the selfish thing; he was going to let her go…

**End of flashback **

He put the letters down. Man. He had been so messed up back then he though to himself.

Although he had thought about her less and less as the months went on. It was still there, that feeling of stupidity and anger at the way he'd treated her. But in the end he still can't reconcile whether he'd made the right decision.

Maybe not in the way he'd handled it, but in not getting into something with someone who wasn't ready when he was probably at the lowest place in his life he'd ever been.

But that was then, he came to the conclusion. Pulling on some clean jeans and a t-shirt.

This was now, and that fact was the idea of seeing her still gave him butterflies, that hadn't changed. But maybe he had.

He wasn't the guy from high school, or even college. Her rejection wouldn't be the end of the world for him now.

He hoped in his car with only one thought in his mind, he had to give it one last try but no matter what happened he could deal with it.

**FRONT OF CHILTON - NOW**

Rory turned around slowly to face him.

"Even after all these years still with the Mary thing" she asked almost smiling

The surprise at her lightheartedness was evident in his face. It was clear that he had anticipated a fight, as there last few encounters had pretty much ended.

"Hey that's one thing that hasn't changed" he stated evenly.

"And what has" she shot back. Walking towards him

"A lot" he replied simply, hand in pockets as he stood before her.

"What happened between us?" she asked finally saying the words she had been wanting to say but had been scared too.

"Do you want the long story or the cliff notes" he said, not looking in the least bit surprised by her question.

"Cliff notes will do for now" she replied seriously.

"The truth is, I believed that you weren't ready for Us…" he began, before Rory cut him off

"But that's…"she interrupted.

"Rory just let me finally get this out" he began, "I thought that you weren't ready for me and you to get serious. I was in love with you, I had been ever since sophomore year, and you were only half way there Rory. I couldn't be with you like that, I was screwed up, you know that, and when you're like that and in love with someone and they're only just hanging in there…I didn't want to hurt you, and I would have, so that's why I pulled away and ignored you"

"But you did hurt me" Rory replied tears forming in her eyes.

"I know that now, but back then…God, it all seemed so simple in my mind. I believed that the only way for you to be happy was for you not to be with me" he finished.

Rory paused for a minute "You're so stupid" she shouted, half laughing and half crying.

"I pour my heart out and you call me stupid!" he replied, not sure what to make of her outburst.

"I was there Tristan, and I know maybe that I didn't always show it, but I was there". She began, "And the sad thing is that even after all the childish stunts you've pulled, I'm still there because, I can't stop thinking about you…" she trailed off.

"So what does that mean?" he asked softly, resting his hands on her hip.

"It means that…I hate you… and also that I think we should finally go on that second date" she stated, laughing in spite of herself.

"Wow a second date, after all this time, at the rate this relationship is going we're going to be 60 before we even get to…" he replied.

"Tristan…" she interrupted wearily.

"Rory" he shot back, matching her tone perfectly.

And just like that they were back to how they'd always been, like the time apart had disappeared and they were Rory and Tristan again.

"I really am sorry" he replied seriously,

"I know" she replied, looking up at him, "and I hope you know… that I really did want to be with you…and I still do"

"I see that now…maybe it was just all the running away that confused me" he said, smirking in spite of himself.

"I promise my sneakers are officially going into retirement, they are being dipped in gold as we speak." she retorted.

Pausing, she placed her hands on his waist and slowly tilted her head up, "So, what now?" she asked

Instead of talking he leant down and slowly placed his lips against hers, kissing her just as he had imagined in the dreams he had of her forgiving him, and for once, everything felt right.


End file.
